Wednesday, December 01, 2021

Let me be by myself in the evening breeze.

Okay. Two days in a row? Good so far. Let's see if our December will improve upon our November. If we go to England (and that is a large "IF" today) I won't have room to take a running kit, which is a shame, but we'll be doing so much walking it won't matter too much, right?

If we go. I don't want to talk about it.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 29:51
Pace: 9:37
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 35°
Climate: cool & nice
Mood: better
Weight: 176.5 lbs. (-2.0)

Yes, I consumed a great many calories yesterday. But not arbitrarily By choice. Making decisions.

Red Hot + Blue: A Tribute To Cole Porter (1990)
I've Got You Under My Skin - Neneh Cherry
In the Still of the Night - The Nevulle Brothers
You Do Something To Me - Sinead O'Connor
Begin the Beguine - Salif Keita
Love For Sale - Fine Young Cannibals
Well Did You Evah! - Debbie Harry & Iggy Pop
Miss Otis Regrets/Just One of Those Things - Kirsty MacColl & The Pogues
Don't Fence Me In - David Byrne
It's All Right With Me - Tom Waits
(to be continued)

Breakfast: banana, coffee (2x)
Lunch: turkey wings, green beans, cookie (1)
Snack: apple
Tea time: decaf, cookie (1x)
Dinner: TBA

Tuesday, November 30, 2021

All this talking is only bravado.

This morning I wrote about control. I don't like that word, control. It suggests an exertion of power, which is not what I am looking for. Rather, to choose. To start again, and to mke a choice. That every moment is a moment to make a choice, to make a helpful (not "correct") choice.

Huffing as I am walking up the stairs at school is not something I approve of. I will take the stairs, I will not take the elevator, not yet. This remains a choice I can make.

I made cookies this morning, for others. Not for me. I ate one, to see what it tastes like, and that is all.

Yesterday I made unfortunate choices. Two snack bags of Doritos. A very large breakfast. I had a bowl of cereal before sleep, what was the point of that? There is no balance. These are not choices. This is a form of power, my id forcing itself on my ego.

Exercising is also a choice, and one I have made for this morning.

Also, I got my glasses repaired yesterday. Didn't even cost anything. That was a happy thing. More happy things.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 32:08
Pace: 10:22
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 34°
Climate: overcast & chilly
Mood: all right?
Weight: 178.5 lbs. (+1.5) 

Nice, easy run. Perfect temperature for the gear I was wearing. Gentle steps. My knees hurt, both of them. Not where they bend, but on top, where they struck the pavement. But running aggravates that, too.

Life is beginning again. Life is always beginning again.

Breakfast: coffee (3x), cookie (1, a tester)
Lunch: turkey leg, green beans, cookie (1, to enjoy)
Snack: banana half
Happy Hour: beer (1x)
Dinner: mushroom & tofu teriyaki stir fry over rice
Cocktail: Od Fashioned
Also: fizzy water (1x)

See? Choice. Decision.

What's That Lyric?
Tinseltown in the Rain - The Blue Nile

Sunday, November 28, 2021

Let me be used.

Thank you, Mr. Sondheim.
Home safe and sound. A low-key run around the pond and back. The ground was damp, but not slippery in any way. I have been achy since I toook my fall the other day. Not the 37 year old man I was when I started this blog.

Using my last pair of glasses, they're plastic, black and blocky. Stupid glasses. Oh, well.

Distance: 2.5 miles
Duration: 24.29 
Pace: 9:48
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 35°
Climate: cold & damp
Mood: all right

Sondheim Playlist
Being Alive - Raul Esparza
Together Wherever We Go - Bernadette Peters
Sooner or Later - Madonna
America - Rita Moreno
Married Today - Madeline Kahn
The Ballad of Sweeney Todd - Michael Cerveris

Friday, November 26, 2021

The voices ring in my head.

We were on our feet all day yesterday, and it was joyous. This year was the first year we prepared a Thankgiving dinner in our home. Ever! Normally we would be in Athens or Lakewood (Lakewood now relegated to memory) or maybe even Minnesota Last year we ordered a pandemic meal from chef Doug Katz.

Pies were baked, sides prepared, and a very well executed turkey, thanks to our son who created and amazing butter mixture to place under the skin. It took all day, we dined at nine. No regrets.

Distance: 1 miles
Duration: 9 minutes
Temperature: 32°

The boy and I set out for a five mile run to and through the cemetery. A little after the one mile mark we encountered a familiar (to me) puddle at the bade of a rise in the turf. I ran up the little hill, as I have in the past, but it was to slippery and a lost my balance. I tried to control my descent but caught the ground with (as I have assessed) my left knee, my right fist, and my face.

My glasses broke, my hands hurt, and my cheek and temple are tender. When I hit I heard a "crunch" which I was afraid might be my skull, but it was just the glasses. They may be repairable, I'm supposed to get new specs at the end of the month.

I rolled onto my back and laughed, I threw my hand up for my son to take. He told me he was afraid at first I put my arm out because I had broken it. I was just saying, "Okay! I'm out!" It hurt. I was wet. It could have been much worse.

Thankful to be whole. Wish I didn't have to go to the show tonight, I'm afraid I'm going to have a bruise. Ah, vanity.

What's That Lyric?
Let Go - Gabriel & Dresden

Wednesday, November 17, 2021

You're lucky to be alive.

The weather turns, I lose interest. Worse, my diet has been terrible. Sorry. It has been terrible. Since before Halloween I have consumed so much sugar. Also, many fast food stops. 

Like, too many fast food stops. I discovered the Arby's across from the building where I take classes. I mean, it's always been there, but who the fuck would go in? me, that's who. Once I got it into my head. Do you know how terrible that food is? Absurd, I need to cut that shit out.

Sugar, grease. And I can feel it in my mouth. The flesh on my tongue becomes sore. It's awful. I need fresh food. Fresh. Food. Fruit, vegetables. Good things! That is how I ate for most of the last year, suddenly, who cares?

And zero exercise. My nights have been terrible. I take melatonin, and when I do sleep, it is deep an full of crazy dreams. But I wake up half a dozen times. Sore, needing to roll over. I only just realized that maybe it is due to the fact that I am no longer exercising, not at all.

I had to teach the past two mornings. Four classes, back to back. Instructing large classes, and acting, too. Last night I slept well, because I had been on my feet.

So, running it is. Let's run.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 31:28
Pace: 10:09
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 62°
Climate: overcast & breezy
Mood: weak
Weight: 177 lbs. (+1.5)

Good day for running, but my legs are shaking. Worn out, tired, unhappy. I hit a deer with my car last night. There are other reasons this day sucks, closer to home.

Breakfast: squash chili & rice, coffee (3x)
Lunch: TBA
Dinner:  TBA

What's That Lyric?
Polyester Bride - Liz Phair

Saturday, October 30, 2021

Seasons don't fear the reaper.

Look, if I can't run on a basic Saturday afternoon, I may as well hang it up. Let's run!

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 30:05
Pace: 9:41
Route: Forest Hillovercast & damp Loop
Temperature: 54°
Climate: overcast & damp
Mood: okay
Weight: 175.5 lbs. (-1.5)

Weary run, underfed and overdressed. Here's how this needs to go: run either before or right after taking the boy to Saturday jazz. Don't wait, you'll just be hungry.

Breakfast: coffee (2x), Count Chocula w/milk
Lunch: ravioli, candy bar (wtf?)
Dinner: TBA

Monster Bash Playlist!
Bad Moon Rising - Creedence Clearwater Revival
The Killing Moon - Echo & the Bunnymen
Halloween - Siouxsie & the Banshees
Dead Souls - Nine Inch Nails
Don't Fear the Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult
Unmarked Helicopters - Soul Coughing
A Girl Like You - Edwyn Collins
Red Right Hand - Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds

I have heard Siouxie's Halloween more times in more places this season ... and I'd never heard it before this month!

Thursday, October 28, 2021

There was a girl who had always run away.

Breathe. Begin again.

Good news, last night I had one drink, which I drank slowly as I did homework.

Bad news, my diet yesterday was garbage. A lot of cheese and oil and ham and chicken and hot sauce, Carbs for days. As I sipped my beverage and read my homework, I also scarfed popcorn, chocolate and Halloween candy.

I opened the Halloween candy. I am reporting this here because I am appalled at myself. Confession is good for the soul.

It's gotten chilly. My left arm has been aching for a week now. First my shoulder, on occasion my entire arm. It's unpleasant. I need to continue with the planking, more upper body work. Any upper body work. And the running.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 29:09
Pace: 9:24
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 48°
Climate: sunny & cold
Mood: aight
Weight: 177 lbs. (+4.0)

Recording my intake has been difficult, because I do not want to admit everything I am eating. But that's why I do it! I will report for a while longer. If I can't write it here, I shouldn't be eating it.

Breathe. Listen to your body. Begin again.

Breakfast: coffee (2x) 
Lunch: Ramen w/egg
Treat: warm chocolate chip cookies (2x) & milk
Treat: M&Ms
Dinner: roast beef sandwich, curly fries
Also, fizzy water (2x), gum (3x)

Cool run today, broke out the cold weather gear. It has gotten much harder for me to run in cold weather, it can be a drag. Especially if there is any wind. But it felt good to move. 

I finally figured out why my left arm hurts -- I was carrying my phone in my hand, the entire ten miles run on Saturday! Quite the workout, for me.

Songs from "Hadestown" (Broadway Cast Recording)
Road to Hell
Wedding Song
Livin' It Up on Top
Way Down in Hadestown
When the Chips Are Down