Tuesday, November 02, 2010

Tonight out on the streets

The good news ... medication allows me to write. I have written more in the past month than in the past year. I have more patience. I have not been depressed, not seriously, not worth mentioning, in some time.

The bad news is I do not want to run.

I do run, I have run, and when I get out I enjoy running. But I have finally noticed that I have ceased to obsess about running, to plan running, and to get depressed when I am not running.

I am amazed, following the almost non-stop sugarfest of the past several days that I have not gained five pounds. But my belly has gone slack, I can feel that tingling sensation in my thighs ... when I ran this evening, my lower back began to seize up.

The weather may have had something to do with this. But it was lovely last week. The fact is, it is difficult to run and have time for other things. It is almost 11 pm now. And I want to do some playwriting. That makes for a late night.

Distance: 3.25 miles
Temperature: 43ยบ
Weather: very cool
Weight: 163.5 lbs.

Most Played Songs On My iTunes
This Must Be The Place - Miles Fisher
Mothership - Kid Beyond
Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa - Vampire Weekend
Oxford Comma - Vampire Weekend
15 Step - Radiohead
Tigerlily - La Roux
Tracking Treasure Down (Gabriel & Dresden Club Mix) - Gabriel & Dresden

2 comments:

Linda Brytak said...

Sorry to read that you are unwell. may I offer two cents of unasked for advice?
seek advice from a naturopath. It is too late for my son now that it has all been said and done. Would that I had sought alternative medicine way back when. Perhaps today I would not be watching him die. Modern medicine is only as good as the person who wrote the book.
be well.

pengo said...

The fact is, I am not unwell. I have never felt better. I came to the realization some time ago that my need to run was a "need" - something which released endorphins which perked me up. Taking anti-depressants seems to alleviate the emotional need to hit the pavement. What I need to do now is become disciplined enough to let my physical need exercise be the motivating factor.

I am very sorry to hear about your son. I do not recommend such medications to everyone. I am 42 years old and for well over a decade I have listened to therapists tell me they would prescribe drugs, only they were fearful it would stymie my creative impulses - which are my livelihood, and reason for living. What I found was that, at least during this phase of my life, I wanted to see for myself what effect they would have. And so far, so good. For me. I cannot speak for anyone else.

I do appreciate your words of support, and best wishes to you and those you love.