Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts

Saturday, September 26, 2026

Wherever you go ... there you are.

DM for more information.
These fall days. I can't sleep all the way to the alarm. I wake, my knees ache, my side. But so? I get up. I have a morning. I can write, eat a good breakfast. And I run. And I love the run. 

Not looking forward to the rec center. The park is a beautiful place to be at dawn. The geese, the deer. The turning of the leaves.

Distance: 3.1 
Duration: 27:03
Pace: 8:42

My brain is still adjusting to the absence of sertraline. It has been several weeks, and I still get dizzy and my brain buzzes.

I am adjusting very well to sobriety. I have entered into situations where I could drink, and I may yet, but I choose not to.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 57°
Climate: ideal
Mood: all right

Fall 1986 Playlist
25 or 6 to 4 (Alternative Version) - Chicago
When Problems Arise - Fishbone
Girl From Ipanema Goes to Greenland - The B-52's
Word Up - Cameo
Walk This Way - Run DMC ft. Aerosmith
Don't Stand So Close to Me '86 - The Police

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 167.4 lbs. (-2.4)

Got my annual fall vaccinations. Suck on that.

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: yes
Sit-Ups: yes

Saturday, August 15, 2026

I'd give up forever to touch you.

Next week!
Okay. Here's the thing. Weed makes me dizzy. If I am dizzy, and I fall down, and I hurt myself, there is no one here to help me. Can we take this lesson and roll with it?

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 28:27
Pace: 9:10

Good hang last night, Josh and I went to the FEAST where I got cavatelli and meatball, and a lemonade, and then we got to fuck out of there. Spend a couple hours catching up on the side porch. Little Italy is, on this Saturday morning, a stinky dump and tonight will only get worse.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 75°
Climate: partly cloudy * humid 
Mood: maintaining

Slept without assistance last night. Couldn't settle in until midnight ... but then I slept until eight. Not bad? Love a Saturday. I remember when many Saturdays would come with a migraine. 

Songs For My Funeral
Gymnopédie No. 1:Var. 1 - Jacques Loussier Trio
The Way - Fastball
Hurt - Johnny Cash
Solsbury Hill - Peter Gabriel
Life on Mars? - David Bowie
Iris - Goo Goo Dolls
Take Me Home - Phil Collins

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 170 lbs. (-0-)

Planks: yes
Push-ups: TBA
Sit-Ups: yes

Must have been looking forward to today's run. Last night I dreamed I was running. I was a mile or so from home, when I realized I had finally done it. I had forgotten to put on shorts.

Friday, August 07, 2026

Thank you for holding me.

August begins in earnest. I am currently alone. And yet, I am booked. It has me a little freaked out, honestly. But maybe it is a good thing. I have plans, I have so many plans. I am also adrift, I don't know what to think, or how.

I need more sleep. Even more sleep. There is never enough sleep.

And I will continue to run.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 29:50
Pace: 9:37

Songs For My Funeral
Thank You For Hearing Me - Shuhada' Sadaqat
Love Is Stronger Than Death - The The
Put Your Records On - Corrine Bailey Rae
The Things We Do For Love - 10cc
Baker Street - Gerry Rafferty
Cue Fanfare - Prefab Sprout
September - Earth, Wind & Fire

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 76° 
Climate: sunny & hot
Mood: better

Spent several hours last night with a good friend, sweating it out on the side porch. I put out the main bulb, so it was all pepper lights and candles, and as our talk continued, the sun went down and our cups refilled, her face began to change. It's always so incredible when that happens. It was a very good night.

I do have friends. Sometimes I know where to look to find them.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 169 lbs. (-1.0)

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA
Sit-Ups: TBA

Got to get on this.

Sunday, April 12, 2026

Sweet serotonin rushes.

The old man is not well, his eye is ulcerated and requires medicine and attention. Friday night he woke me up several times, to get under the covers which is nice except when he gets in and out of bed.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 26:44
Pace: 8:37

Also, the new cat likes to get on top of me when I sleep, which is usually pleasant, but if Tiger is under the covers, then that's an issue. Anyway, it was a bad night's sleep. 

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 57°
Climate: overcast & beautiful
Mood: all right

Today, I will travel to Cincinnati to attend a recital/gig. The wife remains at home to care for an old cat.

2017 Playlist
Formidable Cool - Wolf Alice
Waving Through a Window - Ben Platt
On Hold - The xx
Green Light (Chromeo Remix) - Lorde
Serotonin Rushes - Fujiya & Miyagi
We Got the Power - Gorillaz ft. Jehnny Beth
High Ticket Attractions- New Pornographers
Bad Liar- Selena Gomez

Twenty years ago, on April 10, 2006, I was lamenting the fact that, though I had taken a running kit with me to London, I hadn't done any running. By that time in my life, I had gotten used to -- nay, looked forward to -- taking a run in New York City. Not that I had done it a lot, but I did a few times when I was there for the 2004 NY Fringe.
"Ran roughly four miles. Man, Sunday it is a free-for-all, everyone running in every direction. Keep your head up."
Millennium Bridge, 2006
But that was because I was squatting at an apartment two blocks from the Central Park on the Upper East Side. I knew my way around that part of New York. 
What's On Daddy's iPod?
Transatlanticism - Death Cab for Cutie
In spring 2006, we were staying at my brother's place in Battersea. I had not yet started using mapping programs to find my way around unusual places. The next year, when we returned for the I Hate This tour, I took a run in London and another in Plymouth. I had learned how to prepare.

This weekend, I am preparing by running at home on Sunday morning, and then hopefully on Tuesday, so I don't need to run in Cincinnati at all.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 162 lbs. (+2.0)

We're eating more junk food! Lot of grazing. And cookies. Time to bear down again.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: TBA
Sit-Ups: TBA

Thursday, December 04, 2025

There's a coldness in the air, but I don't care.

Ohio is bisexual now.
Beautiful Christmas jazz in Cincinnati, then home. Now with snow! Had to skip Wednesday, the night before was miserable. Young cats like to keep me awake, old cats do, too. It is difficult, at 1:30 pm, to manage the chaos. I slept two, maybe three hours uninterrupted -- not consecutive hours, mind you. Just an hour or two that were uninterrupted in and of themselves.

Last night was not much better. And I have another stye.

Distance: 3 miles
Duration: 25:27
Route: rec center
Temperature: 27°
Climate: cold
Mood: tired

The Aughts
Get Innocuous! - LCD Soundsystem
Dilemma - Nelly ft. Kelly Rowland
Just Dance - Lady Gaga ft. Colby O'Donis
As the Rush Comes (Gabriel & Dresden Sweeping Strings Remix) - Motorcycle

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 165 lbs.
Goal: 155 lbs.

Membership renewed! One year as a rec center member, and it has paid off. But I need a revised goal. I don't need to be 155, I need to lean toward 155. Because of now, I am leaning in the wrong direction.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes
Sit-Ups: yes

Wednesday, October 08, 2025

The sweet, sweet songs that cloud your eyes.

Now reading:
Run the Song
(Writing about Running about Listening)

by Ben Ratliff
Monday was a very unhappy day, following a seriously anxiety ridden weekend. I cannot tell you how many ways I fucked it over the past several days, it has been difficult, difficult, difficult.

Monday night I had something like a nightmare, but not a scary one. A very, very sad one. I was in love with a very special person, and they did not love me. We talked, we flirted, we understood each other. I wasn't so fond of her at first but she was for me, but as our relationship grew I was just her very special person, but it was not to be. I woke many times that night and each time, no matter what else I had been dreaming of, I felt the heartbreak.

If I could put that into writing, I would have a very successful play, but maybe I've already written it and it didn't work. That's another kind of heartbreak.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 28:18
Pace: 9:07

Sophisti-pop Workout Playlist
Slave to Love - Bryan Ferry
World Machine - Level 42
My Ever Changing Moods - Style Council
Kiss and Tell - Bryan Ferry
Cue Fanfare - Prefab Sprout
Temptation (Extended Mix) - Heaven 17
Up the Junction - Squeeze

This playlist is a work-in-progress.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 61°
Climate: clear & cool
Mood: very anxious

God damn, what a day. Didn't sleep well Monday night, slept worse last night. Things keep not getting better. Family is good, health is good, friends are good. I need to be writing, then at least I could say, at least I'm writing.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 162 lbs.

Good run, though. Beautiful weather. The leaves are turning. Reminds me of falling in love, all the times I fell in love ... and out again.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes
Sit-Ups: yes

Saturday, September 27, 2025

The lengths that I will go to.

*attacked*
Okay. Yesterday, I came home from work and worked. I got up this morning (see below) and continued that work. Then I went to work. It's Saturday.

I was going to go out of town for a day and a half, but I'm no longer doing that. I'm owed a couple days off, but the timing is all wrong. Because I have to work.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 27:55
Pace: 9:00

My right knee has been giving me some serious shit. It's even been keeping me up in the middle of the night. A lot of ibuprofen. I have been waking at 4:00 AM the last couple of days just to take more pain reliever.

Maybe I should take a break from running, but

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 75°
Climate: clear & warm
Mood: all right

Rock Mix
Take Another - Filter
Losing My Religion -R.E.M.
Jumping Jack Flash - Rolling Stones
Hungry For You - The Police
Let the Day Begin - The Call
American Music - Violent Femmes
Terrible Lie - Nine Inch Nails
Come As You Are - Nirvana

Gen X, right?

Stretches: yes 
Water: yes
Weight: 165 lbs.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes
Sit-Ups: TBA

Monday, September 22, 2025

Gotta strut like a front suspension.

The beginning of a long week. Rising at five am isn't the problem, going to sleep at nine pm is. 

Last night, Brian took me to see Emo Philips, who was hilarious. I tried describing him to one of my Gen Z colleagues and it wasn't easy. Gaunt, bug-eyed, non-sequitur humor with a Prince Valiant haircut ... and now he's old! 

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 28:26
Pace: 9:10

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 69°
Climate: misty and damp
Mood: good

160 - 169 BPM Playlist
Little Girl Gone (Workout Remix) - Chinchilla
It's Indian Tobacco My Friend - Cornershop
Greatest - Eminem
Take It Or Leave It - The Strokes
Good Thing - Fine Young Cannibals
Young Americans - David Bowie
I Wanna Be Sedated - The Ramones
Concrete Jungle - The Specials

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 160 lbs.

Got a stitch while running through the wood. That's not normal but it's the second time that has happened to me in the past week. I'm so used to never getting cramps, but at least I can run through them.

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA
Sit-Ups: yes

Sunday, July 06, 2025

Soon it's a race, it's a rush and a high.

It is such a joy to discover that a theatre somewhere in the United States is producing one of my plays. Of course, we are producing one much closer to home, and there is much to celebrate in that.

The weather is not unbearable, though we do have air conditioning. What will happen when we do not?

The sleeps have been good, I have been trying not to use assistance in falling asleep these past several nights, and it is mostly successful. On occasion we knock ourselves out, it seemed kind of bleary for a while.

The real issue this weekend is allergies. I use drops, but my eyes were all red yesterday, all day. I have resumed taking OTC allergy meds today, I hope that shows results. 

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 29:21
Pace: 9:28

Roaring Twenties Playlist
Levitating - Dua Lipa
Caution - The Killers
Some Dreams (Extended Version) - Flock of Seagulls
Too Late Now (156 BPM) - Wet Leg
Exhausting Lover - Ben Folds
Sexy Villain - Remi Wolf
Lost Track (162 BPM) - Haim
Just the Once - Metric

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 79°
Climate: sunny & bright
Mood: good
Stretches: yes
Water: yes!
Weight: 160 lbs.

Saturday, May 24, 2025

I hate to feel so confined.

The rain subsides ... for the moment. Three-day weekend. So much time! So many opportunities! There's a new piece I want to write, I'll bang out ten pages to bring to Dark Room next month.

The kitten can be a problem, Masha wakes me up, a lot. And waking up a lot is not good for me. The wife and I take turns coming downstairs at four or five to open the side door so she (Masha) can birdwatch, then we fall asleep on the couch.

Last night it was her (my wife's) turn, so I got to sleep in. A rare treat. 

Distance: 6 miles
Duration: 52:52
Pace: 8:48
  
Perfect weather for a longer run.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 54°
Climate: partly cloudy & cool
Mood: good
Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 159 lbs.

Created playlists for each set of romantic couples in The Right Room.

Aubrey + Steven Mixtape (1994)
Tempted - Squeeze
I Burn For You - The Police
Possession - Sarah MacLachlan
Sour Times - Portishead
Get Me - Everything But the Girl
Shoop - Salt-N-Pepa
Cuts You Up - Peter Murphy
In the Flesh - Blondie
I Melt With You - Modern English
Constant Craving - k.d. lang
Come to Me - Björk
The Paris Match - Style Council ft. Tracey Thorn
Closer - Nine Inch Nails

Tuesday, November 19, 2024

Take a step now.

Grateful thanks, Q.
Lying awake, fretting about the world, is I thing I do not like to do. And since the election, I have literally been drugging myself. The sertraline has its own soporific effects. occasionally I take melatonin. During the lockdown I took melatonin a lot, way too much. Even now if I have it more than one night in a row it makes the mornings very challenging.

Then there's the cannabis. There's this hybrid I picked up in Maine that just knocks me out. But that's the thing, it just knocks me out. I can watch a movie or read, I just want to go to sleep. There are other strains for that kind of activity, and I sleep well then, too.

But. Can I just sleep? Like, just have normal uninduced rest? And if so, when?

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 28:57
Pace: 9:20

I actually wrote that a few days ago, and have experimented with uninduced sleep the past two nights, and they have been successful. I just rest. Long days, active days, followed by rest. Avoiding the socials has been a great help. Breaking bad habits. I don't feel I am missing anything.

Quincy Jones Playlist
Soul Bossa Nova (156 BPM)
Love Is in Control (Finger on the Trigger) - Donna Summer
Theme from "Sanford & Son"
Come Together - Brothers Johnson
Billie Jean - Michael Jackson
I Can't Help It - Michael Jackson
I'll Be Good to You - Ray Charles & Chaka Khan
Give Me the Night - George Benson

Thanks, Mr. Jones! That was a brisk and joy filled run.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 51°
Climate: nice & cool
Mood: good
Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Pain Reliever: TBD

For the record, I am holding fast at 170 lbs. I am not trying to "diet" I am simply being mindful, as they say. Recording the intake in Noom. Learning about the calories, the good, the bad, and the empty.  

Sunday, January 07, 2024

뛰는 놈.

Car-Free Saturday run with Annie
August 2013
Illness overwhelmed me after the holiday. All the coughing and exhaustion. Then I get one night in complete quiet and darkness and solitude, and I am just awake. Drowsing a bit but awake. Why? No idea. Finally slept a bit in the early morning and immediately popped into my kit. Let's do this now, if even for only a mile or two. 

Distance: 2 miles
Duration: 20:38
Pace: 10:19

Up at 4:30, writing in my journal, "Water tastes SO GOOD."  

Route: Burlington Loop (clockwise)
Temperature: 33°
Climate: overcast w/light snow
Pavement: damp
Mood: all right

2013 Playlist
The City - The 1975  
Right Action - Franz Ferdinand
Animals - Martin Garrix
Gangham Style (강남스타일) - Psy
Harlem - New Politics
When a Fire Starts to Burn - Disclosure

Man. That playlist was fire, as the kids say.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Baseline: 180 lbs.
Weight: 180 lbs. (-0-) 
Goal: 175 lbs.

"The guy who runs."

Friday, September 01, 2023

Give me two strong arms to protect myself.

We made it to the end of the first week of rehearsal. The mornings are cool, and quiet -- and calm. Waking early means I can take my time, I am not as affected by dizzyness, because I am moving easily. And peacefully. Taking care of morning business, checking the boxes. And then sitting and writing. No anxiety. No urgency. No worry, no care.

Is this interesting? I do not care.

Sleep last night wasn't bad, but I dropped a melatonin so I'm not as bright this morning as I might be. But I slept, or at least I slept until 4:30 am. I always wake up twenty minutes or thereabouts before my alarm.

I hope I can sleep in a little tomorrow, and without a headache. That would be an awesome close to my week.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 28:29
Pace: 9:11
Route: Forest Hill Loop (path cleared!)
Temperature: 55°
Climate: cool
Mood: yes
 
Ooh! Surprised myself! Strong, swift, happy run this morning. See? Things are very good, too.
 
Stretches: yes
Bicycles: 20
Sit-Ups: 20
Planks: 90 sec. 
Water: yes

Breakfast: coffee w/cream, fresh fuit w/granola & yogurt 
Coffee Break: coffee w/cream, chocolate cupcake ... and the last of the danish.
Lunch: Hot Tito slice, spicy ranch dunk
Snack: Snickers
Dinner: INDULGENT DINNER AT PROVENANCE
Alcohol? 2x Happy hour Guinness + dinner Manhattan

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: 171 lbs. (-0-)
Goal: 165 lbs.

Reading: The New Yorker (30 min.)
Writing: research (how to make toothpaste)

What's That Lyric?
Right By Your Side (172 bpm) - Eurythmics 

Wednesday, August 30, 2023

Cover me when I run.

Third day. Poor sleep. Warm night. Slight head pain. Knees feel better. Maybe another day of light exercise. 

Distance: 3.25 miles
Duration: 30:25
Pace: 9:21
Route: Boulevard Loop
Temperature: 61°
Climate: overcast & cool
Mood: good
 
Ah, naw. Full 5K. Let's get this.
 
Stretches: yes
Sit-Ups: 20
Water: yes

Breakfast: coffee w/cream, cinnamon bagel & cream cheese
Snack: "fruit snacks"
Lunch: jerk chicken bowl, danish
Snack: almonds & dried cranberries, Funyuns flavored potato chips
Dinner: Mongolian beef over rice
Alcohol? Immigrant Son Common Ale

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: 170 lbs. (-0-)
Goal: 165 lbs.

Reading: HTD (30 in.)
Writing: 1 scene

What's That Lyric?
Shock the Monkey - Peter Gabriel

Tuesday, June 20, 2023

Promote the hustle because it keeps me thin.

Decisions.
Day two, second week of theater camp. 

So much to do! 
So much to see! 
So many adolescent emotions to experience vicariously!

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 30:54
Pace: 9:58
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 67°
Climate: sunny & humid
Mood: good

Got up a little earlier this morning, to provide more time to run. And yet, what I really want to do is go back to sleep again. I'm looking forward to this week being over. 

Stretches: yes
Plank: 90 sec.
Sit-ups: 20x
Upper body: tbd
Water: yes

Feeling a little sick to my stomach heading out the last two times, running on an empty stomach. That hasn't bothered me recently.

Breakfast: coffee w/cream, fresh strawberry, blueberry, banana w/granola & yogurt
Treat: doughnut
Lunch: brisket, turkey & cheese on roll, strawberries
Snack: Haribo cola bottles, pretzel rods (2x) 
Happy Hour: fizzy water
Dinner: Don Corleone Pizza (1 slice), strawberry macadamia salad
Alcohol? No

When doughnuts are offered, you take one.

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: 173 lbs. (-2.0)
Goal: 170 lbs.

What's That Lyric?
A Roller Skating Jam Named "Saturdays" - De La Soul

Sunday, May 07, 2023

The revolution will not make you look five pounds thinner.

Boy in the back, on drums.
Hope you got your griddles.
Falling into old habits, consuming too much at mealtime, a useless alcoholic beverage just before bed, not doing the exercises, taking a sleep aid.

The diet must be excused, this weekend has been delightful madness, attending two of our son's jazz concerts (school, Tri-C) on Friday night and Saturday afternoon -- each pushing three hours in length -- and then a play last night at Karamu. Dining out was practically necessary, especially with three house guests, if you include the eldest.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 27:31
Pace: 8:52
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 64°
Climate: overcast & nice
Mood: good

160 - 169 bpm Playlist
Coming Up Close - 'Til Tuesday
The Revolution Will Not Be Televised - Gil Scott-Heron
Lake Shore Driving - Duran Duran
Clandestino - Manu Chao
Boombox - The Mosquitos
Rocket In My Pocket - Little Feat
Giving Up On You - Wild Belle
Thick As Thieves - The Jam
You Win Again - Bee Gee's
 
Yeah, like we're in training or something. Broke three back-to-bac nine minute miles, that's been a while. Set the playlist to overlap to keep up the pace. It felt good.
 
Stretches: yes
Abdominals: 90 sec.
Upper body: 10 rep. (2x)
Water: yes

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: time to get a new bathroom scale
Goal: 175 lbs.

Friday, May 05, 2023

Four-Mile Elder Run

This is weird.
Last Monday, when the eldest and I took that run in Athens and it was so fucking windy, they asked if I remembered that time on the beach and of course I knew exactly what they were talking about.

We had run about a mile down the beach, which was fine, and then turned around and I realized we had made a mistake, because the wind was very, very hard. It was 2015, they were twelve.

The goal, of course, was to run the Island Independence Day 5K together and they had already expressed concern that they wouldn't be able to manage it. This suddenly very difficult training run did not help.

On Sunday I reminded them how we had succeeded, we made the 5K, in our matching Captain America shirts, and finished it together in very good time.

Yes, they said. Even that day on the beach, they pushed hard and ran all the way to the house without stopping, peeling away from me and up the beach. At the time I thought they were trying to get away from me, that they were angry with me. What they were really trying to do was finish, by getting back to the house.

"I kept saying things like, you're doing great," I recalled. "And you kept telling me to shut up."

They laughed. They apologized. No need.

Distance: 4 miles
Duration: 41:34
Pace: 10:23
Route: Cain Park Loop
Temperature: 58°
Climate: sunny & warm
Mood: very good

Is it a coincidence that, after the first evening I have a cocktail at home, that my sleep is disrupted so completely? The fat before was fraught with anxiety, and I sought to unwind, but I slept a few hours and then lie awake, worrying.

Not just about issues, but about my health. I felt achy. I had resumed upper body exercises, was that it? Or did I have Covid? Were the next two weeks ruined?

I got up. I had a glass of water. I read. I tried to go back to sleep.
 
Stretches: yes
Abdominals: tbd
Upper body: tbd
Water: yes

Eldest requested a four mile and chose the city route. Went extremely well, it makes me so happy when they are home. And I feel so much better than I did in the middle of the night.

Friday, April 14, 2023

The harder they fall.

Long day, teaching improvisation at a school and hour's drive away. Coming home at 3:00 PM, seventy degree heat, literally almost fell asleep once or twice. Not good. I should have pulled over for a beverage. This is a lesson. 

Distance: 2.5 miles
Duration: 24:51
Pace: 9:56
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 73°
Climate: sunny & hot
Mood: good

Snuck in a short run before heading over to a friend's to see them on Jeopardy. I thought, maybe tomorrow? But there's no way I have time for a run tomorrow. I also need to make sure I don't fall asleep at the wheel.

2014 Playlist
After the Disco - Broken Bells
She's Not Me - Jenny Lewis
Figure It Out - Royal Blood
Animals - Martin Garrix
Timber - Pitbull ft. Ke$ha
Fever - The Black Keys
I'm Not the Only One - Sam Smith

What was 2014? Not great. The year of no plays (there was Seven Ages.) Doing a great deal of research for The Great Globe Itself. Felt as though I blew every opportunity to be a good parent. Like, I there was not one thing I couldn't fuck up.
 
Stretches: yes
Abdominals: 90 sec.
Upper body: 10 reps
Water: yes

Breakfast: coffee w/cream, oatmeal w/dried fruit, brown sugar, butter & cream 
Lunch: hot dog, fries, veggies & dip, frozen fruit cup, milk
Snack: dried fruit & nuts
Dinner: pizza w/chicken & peppers, veggies, fruit, cookies, Goldhorn pilsner

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: 181.5 lbs. (-0.5)
Goal: 180 lbs.

Saturday, March 25, 2023

I keep a-running when the trouble follows.

Being demoralized makes me sleepy. Like, literally. when I am depressed, I just want to lie down. That was me on Friday. I did take a nap (I have really been avoiding naps) it didn't help, and then I just wanted another one a couple hours later. Luckily, we had dinner plans.

Distance: 3.1 miles
Duration: 31:20
Pace: 10:05
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 61°
Climate: it's complicated (see below)
Pavement: wet
Mood: driven

Slept in too late, again. The wife says, why not, but I know why. My head hurts. Sleeping in makes my head hurt, full stop. But I did manage to do some writing which was nice.

We're the the home stretch for March Mildness, and I am anxious about what comes next. Will I just lose my resolve? Gain the weight back? Go back to scarfing down treats and swilling booze? Abstinence is easier for me than moderation. 
 
2017 Playlist
Always Ascending - Franz Ferdinand
Plimsoll Punks - Alvvways
Want You Back - Haim
River - Bishop Briggs
IDGAF - Dua Lipa
Lucky Penny  - JD McPherson
I Give You Power - Mavis Staples ft. Arcade Fire
Across the Room - ODESZA ft. Leon Bridges (164 bpm)
 
Thought I missed my window of opportunity. Forecast said sixty degrees all week, by the time I got out the sun had gone and it was very windy, dark and thunderous. I went anyway. Running into the wind was a bear, but not unbearable.

As I was entering the woods, I could see a break in the clouds approaching, and by the time I emerged it was sunny again! It was beautiful, and totally worth it. I am much stronger! Stronger than I have been in years!

Also, I was depressed -- but now I feel much better.
 
Stretches: yes
Abdominals: 90 sec. (2x)
Water: yes

Breakfast: coffee w/oatmilk, pasta salad w/tuna (1 C.)
Pre-Run Snack: banana
Lunch: pizza, ranch, salad
Snack: clementine
Happy Hour: OJ on ice
Dinner: pasta w/mushroom & meat sauce, spinach soufflé

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: 183 lbs. (-0.5)
Goal: 180 lbs.

Saturday, March 11, 2023

Watch me run away.

Not napping during the day, and not drinking any alcohol, and exercise, these things have all contributed to healthy nights of sleep. I hope this continues.

We went out for dinner last night, an evening of dietary indulgence. So strange, to leave a restaurant entirely sober.

Distance: 2.55 miles
Duration: 26:18
Pace: 10:19
Route: Forest Hill Loop (pond only)
Temperature: 30°
Climate: overcast & cold
Pavement: mostly dry
Mood: good, you know?

Pushing through a quick morning run. Not sure I will have time for it later.
 
2019 Playlist
Black Out (Acoustic) - Frank Turner
Running Up That Hill - Meg Myers
This Time It's Different - Heart Bones
Hold On - Ames
See You at Your Funeral - Pup
Comeback Kid - Sharon Van Etten
Moderation - Florence + The Machine
No Roots- Alice Merton
 
What was 2019? My worst marathon. The boy started high school that fall, the wife her final year at that school. Mom began her decline. There were good times, About a Ghoul was a highpoint. 
 
Stretches: yes
Abdominals: 90 sec.
Water: yes

Breakfast: coffee w/oatmilk cream, strawberry yogurt w/pineberries banana & granola
Lunch: corned beef on rye, potato chips
Dinner: popcorn
Cocktail Hour: Fresca

Baseline: 195 lbs.
Current: 187 lbs. (-1.0)
Goal: 185 lbs.