Showing posts with label potty break. Show all posts
Showing posts with label potty break. Show all posts

Saturday, March 17, 2012

So don't you dare talk to me about running.

Nine miles out. Time to head back.
Week 9 Total: 27 miles+
Training to Date: 221 miles

The last week it has been my hip. My right hip, hurts to stand from sitting, hurts to lie down on at the end of the day. The wife suggests butterfly stretches, which is a nice idea and all except they make a man look stupid.

The show I am rehearsing opens with me crawling into the second story window of someone's apartment. This is done in clumsy slow-motion, and hopefully it's funny to watch. I have scored a large bruise on my right knee, not to mention several splinters in my hands. Hi-diddle-dee-dee.

Distance: 18 miles
Duration: 2 hours, 49 minutes
Route: MLK to Dead Man's Curve and back.
Band-aids: check*
Lip balm: check

Investigation. It is March 17 (St. Patrick's Day) but unseasonably warm. Are any facilities open? Will there be water available? I could have checked, I have been driving this route, to and from rehearsal, for two weeks. But I have made no time for it. Stepping into the unknown.

Temperature: 59º
Climate: warm
Weight: 164 lbs.
Snack: banana & GU
Hydration? yes ... barely
Stretches? yes
1. Stopped in to void at the depressing Coffee House at University Circle.

2. Water fountains shut off at Wade Oval, VA Hospital. Getting concerned.

3. Lots of folks heading into town at 8 AM.

4. Cereal fruit bar on North Marginal Road.

5. Port-o-john at East 72nd Street Park. Last cleaned Monday. Sorry, ladies.

6. Halfway mark at 1 hour, 25 minutes. Now we run into the sun.

7. *Somewhere my "waterproof" bandages washed away. Might need to shave.

8. 13 miles in just 2 hours. Now five miles ... uphill.

9. GU with Gandhi.

10. Legs very heavy. Otherwise feel great. I believe if I had brought some water, I might not be having this problem.

11. One mile to go, stopped in at CH-UH Rec Center for some cold, refreshing WATER!

12. Beer at 10 AM. I ran 18 miles, what's your excuse?
Podrunner:
Out With a Bang (165 BPM)
Boys Don't Cry (12" Extended Version 1986) - The Cure (171 BPM)
Corybantic (162 BPM)
Wonderwall - Oasis (173 BPM)
Apogee (166 BPM)

+ MONDAY UPDATE: My schedule on Sunday made a recuperative run impossible.

Saturday, February 04, 2012

I smell of the earth and am worn by the weather.

My breakfast with Gandhi.

Good Lord, waking up this morning it felt as though I have not gone on a run for a month. Just seems like a long time ago. Why is that?

However, today was epic. Just perfect, no pain, just a nice, long run. No issues.

Route: Home to Gandhi (and back)
Distance: 10 miles

My first ten-miler was on July 22, 2006. I wrote:
Down Mayfield to Little Italy, through University Circle, four laps around Wade Oval, past Severance Hall, stopped to look up at Rainbow where my son recovers from a fractured skull, back up through Little Italy, and home.
Temperature: 36º
Climate: perfect, cool & dry
Weight: 177.5 lbs.
Snack: banana + fruit leather
Hydration? yes
Stretches? yes

Went a little crazy yesterday. Attended an event at a high school yesterday, our host teacher insisted I take a snack bag of chips. In fact, she literally put four of them in my hands. These are the small ones you get at Marc's for a quarter. Still, saying no is easy, and yet I walked out with four snack bags of chips in my hands. I was thinking, I will share these with my children.

No, of course not. They never made it home. The chips, I mean. Not the children.

Then, before bed, tea ... and a large frosting-covered brownie. The hell is wrong with me?

1990 Playlist (Part One)
Where Are You Baby - Betty Boo
Bust a Move - Young MC
Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now) - C+C Music Factory
Tokoloshe Man - Happy Mondays
Cuts You Up - Peter Murphy
Elephants & Flowers - Prince
Don't Fence Me In (162 bpm) - David Byrne
World In My Eyes - Depeche Mode
B.B.D. (I Thought It Was Me)? - Bell Biv DeVoe
Policy of Truth - Depeche Mode
Sadeness [The Gulf edit] - Enigma

1. MOCA Borg Cube.

2. Port-a-john by the tennis courts retired for the season. Oh dear.

1990 Playlist (Part Two)
Serious - Duran Duran
So Hard - Pet Shop Boys
I Am Stretched On Your Grave - Sinéad O'Connor
Groove Is In The Heart - Deee-Lite
Pure - Lightning Seeds
Vogue - Madonna
Never Enough [Big Mix] - The Cure
Freedom 90 - George Michael
Who Wants To Be A Millionaire - The Thompson Twins
Everybody Everybody - Black Box


3. Five minutes with Gandhi. Hydration and fruit leather. Had to sneak down to the creek to pass water. I know the Mahatma would not mind.

4. Do not sneak down the the creek before dawn. It's like the Blair Witch Project down there.

Cooldown:
Poison - Bell Biv DeVoe
Here's Where the Story Ends - The Sundays

And I'm sorry to everyone. I am so so sorry for everything that has happened.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Like I'm on fire.


Fire Genius Mix
Fire - Ferry Corsten
9 PM (‘Till I Come) - ATB
Mass Repeat - Gabriel & Dresden
Strobe - Deadmau5
Lonliness (MUC Remix) - Tomcraft
Hi Friend! - Deadmau5 ft. MC Flipside
LA Ride - Tiësto
Uninvited - Freemasons 
Dangerous Power (Extended Mix) - Gabriel & Dresden

Distance: 5 miles

A few years ago (2006) there was a trend of sampling one single line from some really familiar song by a white pop star from the 1980s and using that as the basis for an entire house mix.  Call on Me by Eric Prydz.  Tell Me Why by Supermode. Proper Education by ...well, Eric Prydz.  Last week on Pandora I caught this one that I had never heard before - Fire by Ferry Corsten.  What was particularly interesting was unlike those other tracks, the lyric from a single from the least popular Duran Duran record ever made.  I thought I was one of two people who knew or was fond of the song Serious from the album Liberty.  But apparently Ferry Corsten likes it.

Lakewood, Ohio, your sidewalks are awful.  Oh, I have been known to complain about sidewalks in the Cleveland Heights, but the sidewalks of Clifton Boulevard and Lake Avenue are a horrible clown show.

Beautiful, cool morning.  Happy Father’s Day.  Almost had an accident, thank heaven for Lakewood Park. Mmm. Toilet.

Monday, November 06, 2006

New York you make it happen

Saturday Night

Freaking out about my chip situation, I decide to head back to the Expo at the Javits Center. After waiting over a half hour for the shuttle in front of the Hyatt, a guy from Chicago named Joe and I jump a cab and get to the Expo. They are tearing everything down around when we arrive; compared to the excitement of the day before it's weird, it's like something is over, not beginning.

As it turns out, now both chips are registered, I could use either. I decide to use theirs, I don't know why.

That night I have dinner with two old college friends, Andrew F. and Missy H. Andrew buys me a pasta dinner at this great Italian place across the street froom where he works. Andrew designs props for the American Airlines Theater, after dinner he gave us a brief tour of the set of Heartbreak House.

I stop off at a market for extra food; a banana, pretzels, the odd energy bar, and a way too big bottle of water. Back to Coop's place, I lay out my gear, pack my bag and get in bed around 9.30.

Race Day

I don't sleep much at all, I wake up every twenty minutes. At 3.50, ten minutes before my alarm goes off, I get out of bed, clean up and suit up. I hate to consume anything when I first wake up, but force myself to drink a pint of water and eat a banana. I kiss my wife good-bye, say I'll see her on First Avenue, and head for the subway.

I chew a bagel on the way to the subway station. As I wait for the 6, other guys show up in running gear and their "official" bags. We were each given a clear plastic bag, the only bag, we are told, we can take to the starting area. No bags inside of bags either, it's obviously a security thing. We're all like, hey, and hi, and have a great run. But not very loudly.

By 5 am there's a line up us walking up 42nd street towards the library, and there are at least twenty busses waiting for us. After all that fretting about my bus pass, they never even check. They just want to see that we have numbers, there's no way they could see the small lettering on them that says if we have a pass or if this is the right pick up area. Whatever.

I have a great conversation with a guy from Toronto (sorry, I forgot your name) who ran the Cleveland Marathon last May. He kept saying really sweet things about our city and I kept biting my tongue from running the place down because we all do that.

Fort Wadsworth, Staten Island

I am there before dawn, maybe the sceond bus there. Looks like a refugee camp. There's even experienced runners who have brought sleeping bags so they can just crash until start time. The only thing I missed was a scarf, otherwise I was relatively warm. I spent four hours pacing, having two small cups of coffee, eating another bagel, and another banana, trying to read the Sunday Times with gloves on, going to rest room as strenuously as possible. When I tried sitting to read my body temperature dropped rapidly and so I got up again and just kept moving.

I even got in line for a massage. I didn't really need one, but it was something to do. She worked my back, I get tense in my shoulders a lot and my lower back hurt from all the pacing. By now the sun was up and I sat and worked on my red shirt. I wrote PENGO in block letters on the front. On the back I wrote:

CALVIN B.
ZELDA D.
ORSON A.
&
TONI K.


with a heart and a star. They got me to this place, I wanted to take them with me.

The people from different countries amazed me. Close to the start I met a young man named Matt from London. This was his first marathon, too - and he came from London. For his first marathon. So did I. Cool.

In my corral (the 20000 - 20999 corral) I found the 4:00 pace guy. I was going to follow the 4:15 pace team, but I'd already met this Londoner so I stayed there. Regardless, maybe I could pull off something like four hours, and maybe this was a big mistake, but whatever, I'd just let some people pass me first.

We began to move, and I took off the black sweats I'd gotten at Unique Thrift. I would be wearing my Asics all-weather black cap, glasses with a strap (not sunglasses) Lands Ends black long-sleeve tee, red Under Armour shirt, black Under Armour shorts, black running shocks and my Asics gels. I had gloves I planned on ditching. One last pee and we headed for the start. I was also wearing my iPod, had two GUs pinned to my shorts, and a tube of Carmex tucked into my waistband.

All my gear choices turned out to be perfect.

Verrazano-Narrows Bridge

I reach the start line roughly six minutes after the gun goes off. My headphones are off, I am saving that for later. Just the thrill of, well, finally being here. I was nervous for a fraction of a second back on the bus, now, after hours of waiting, I am just happy to be moving. The sky is cloudless, the weather is mild, it is going to be a beautiful day for running.

Already there are men relieving themselves, over the edge of the Verranano-Narrows Bridge. I just don't think that's right. Over the next four plus hours, I will see guys just letting it go over bridges, through chain link fences, anywhere really. I also seeing amused photographers taking pictures of small groups of guys, pissing into parking lots.

Good-bye Staten Island.

Brooklyn

Brooklyn was amazing. And very, very long. After a two-mile bridgem we would be in the Borough of Kings until the race was half-over. Shortly after we arrived, we were greeted by large, large crowds of cheering locals. When I saw a guy holding a sign reading FINISHING IS YOUR ONLY F*CKING OPTION I knew it was going to be a good day.

There were Irish runners wearing big green hats, a guy dressed as a rhino. a surprising number of Norwegians in the pack, Dutch runners with matching orange jerseys sporting questionable cartoons of Africans, a guy dressed like the Statue of Liberty, and, so they tell me, Bobby Flay.

For most of Brooklyn I enjoyed the ambient sound, the bands playing every couple of miles. I drank at maybe every other station, sometimes water, sometimes Gatorade. I forced myself to drink even when I didn't want to, necessarily, though I found as I was drinking, that I really did.

Whenever I took long runs during my training, I would feel terribly drained after a while. I attributed this to a lack of something in my system. At five miles, I took my first GU, right before a water station to wash it down.

10K split: 0:57:33

By seven miles, I began to wonder if we were in Queens yet, and had to remind myself that that wouldn't come until mile 13. I tried keeping the bouncing balloons held by the 4:00 pace captain in sight, but needed to take a leak (at an actual port-o-john) and spent a few miles trying to catch up. I was going much faster than I should have. By the time we reached Queens, I lost them for the rest of the run.

I began getting that drained feeling before the Half-Marathon, and worried I hadn't packed enough to eat. They warn you not to pick up anything not at an official table, which is a shame, because there were kids with small water bottles, old ladies with orange slices, guys with bananas. I took a Twizzler at one point, because I thought that was good luck, until I remembered I never chew Twizzlers thoroughly enough. I had my second GU, this one with caffeine in it. I knew there would be a PowerBar Gel station at mile 18, and hoped I would last until then.

I had read on some message board that you shouldn't put your name on your shirt, that it gets annoying after a while. Everyone else said to do it. Well, I didn't write my name, I wrote my nickname. And I gotta tell you, I never got sick of perfect strangers yelling "Pengo!" at me. That was a big boost, and whenever I needed it, I moved from the center of the street to one of the curbs.

Queensboro Bridge

A steep incline, luckily I read in one of the magazines that there is a stunning view of Manhattan if you look to your left. I did, and it was. It was breathtaking. It was one of several moments during the run I almost, but didn't, burst into tears. God, I love that city.

Choice track: Such Great Heights - The Postal Service

Earlier in the run I was concerned I was dressed just a little too heavily. Maybe I didn't need to his thermal undershirt, at least not in the bright sunlight and 50º weather of Brroklyn. But the two miles on the lower level of the Queensboro Bridge made me grateful I had it on, that was brisk.

Choice track: Winners - 7 Seconds of Love

As we headed down the bridge descending into Manhattan, I said possibly the only thing out loud I had said to that point. I said, "That's a lot of people."

Half-marathon split: 2:00:17

First Avenue

Outstanding. First Avenue, deep with people, for miles. Bright and sunny again, heading uptown. My family was supposed to be waiting for me at 81st Street, but I started looking for them much earlier, on the west side of the street, looking for the SpongeBob Squarepants sign I got them from the expo. I missed the "official" banana station looking for my wife, but - I kid you not - I almost slipped on a banana peel.

Choice track: Future Sightings - I Am the World Trade Center

They were right where they said they'd be, Coop was holding the sign, which read "Go Go Pengo!" or I never would have seen them. I leaned over to kiss my wife and little girl, and headed off again. And then I got really, really tired. It was only mile 17.

I had used the iPod intermittently, but relied on it more heavily to keep my spirits up. I snagged a PowerBar Gel, and then a second one for later.

Choice track: A Little Less Conversation - Elvis Presley

I have no idea whether it is a boon or a curse to be familiar with the geography and relative distances of Manhattan in this situation. I knew I was racing into the hundreds, and that after a brief swing through the Bronx, it would still be a long way back to Central Park.

The Bronx

On the Willis Avenue Bridge we were greeted by a Scots drum and pipes band. Not as many people to see us at the Bronx, maybe the feel slighted being such a short part of the route. I was feeling distress in my abdomen, couldn't tell if it was just all of the synthetic protein and carbs or all the fluid I had been taking in, or just gas. I stopped at another port-o-john, which was a big risk. I tried keeping my legs moving as I pee'ed - that was a very good idea - and then got back on the road.

I applied lip balm ever few miles, I never lost the lip balm. I still had the gloves I'd tucked in my waistband.

And then we were back in Manhattan.

Fifth Avenue

I mostly listened to the iPod through Harlem and on toward the Park. The family was going to cross over and meet me there - at first my wife had said she would see me on the avenue, and then she changed that so I wasn't sure where I would see her. So I began looking well up the street. It was a good thing, too, another distraction.

Remember; I had never even run 20 miles before. The one time I tried it I fell slightly short, going from Cleveland Heights to Lakewood. Once I did hit 20, in the Bronx, I thought, well, from here on out I have no idea what I am capable of. I tried to drive any notion of what it was going to feel like stopping, of finishing, of having the medal, of seeing my kids again, out of my head.

Choice track: Put Your Records On - Corinne Bailey Rae

We crossed into Central Park. After another half mile or so, I found my family again. I wasn't stopping this time, I was just happy to see them. The last two miles were ridiculous. I can't say they were impossible, I didn't slow down any more than I already had (LOTS of people passed me on Fifth Avenue) I just kept going, not too slowly, either, it just didn't seem like it was ever going to end.

Final track: It's My Life (Vocal Mix) - Liquid People vs. Talk Talk

Remember, these tracks are at random, and this one was next. I listened to it a lot during my training, one of those songs from my teenage yeras that was playe so much it lost meaning at the time, but has creepingly gained meaning in the time since. And the artist who was Talk Talk now goes under the name Liquid People and "remixed" this track, which means he mostly put a thudding beat under it that makes it incredible to work out to. It was exactly what I needed at that point in time, reminding me of all the work I'd put into this. I just shut everyone out except for the deafening cheering that came through.

Out to south end of the park, and then back in, I headed to the finish line. There was no feeling of overwhelming exhilaration then, just relief.

Finish time: 4:15:28
Overall place: 16,838 (out of 38,368)
Average pace: 9:45

Saturday, October 21, 2006

I'll be running circles around you sooner than you know.

Went to bed relatively early - 10.30pm. Woke to the alarm groggy but ready to do this ... and discovered it was midnight! The alarm had reset, I had six more hours to sleep! That was a good sign, that I was committed to do this on an hour and a half of sleep.

Six hours later I rose and dressed for cold. Welcome back butter beanie, welcome back bullethead. Yesterday I got new soles, new gloves (awesome gloves) and a new running hat.

My route was circuitous. I would run three five-mile circuits around my house. The first two ended with a pee break, Gatorade and GU (Strawberry banana - disgusting; Vanilla Bean - vile.) and after ten miles, I ditched the new soles for the old ones, the new ones were making the toes on my right foot go to sleep.

Yes, a very good run. Roger does Chicago tomorrow, positive thoughts and energy to Roger!

Distance: 15 miles
Duration: roughly two and a half hours
Weight: 165.5 lbs.
Stretches: yes
Drink: yes
Snack: Balance Bar Gold
Time: 6:50am
Weather: 43º cold & clear - no wind

"The Big Love" Playlist
Warm-Up: Upside Down - Jack Johnson
The Sporting Life - The Decemberists
Such Great Heights (Album) - The Postal Service
Before Today - Everything But the Girl
Jerk It Out - Caesars
I Predict A Riot - Kaiser Chiefs
Future Sightings - I Am the World Trade Center
Red - Sister Soleil
Hips Don't Lie (Featuring Wyclef Jean) - Shakira f. Wyclef Jean
Burning Down The House - Tom Jones & The Cardigans
Exquisite Corpse - Hedwig & the Angry Inch
Decent Days And Nights - The Futureheads
All Things Just Keep Getting Better - Widelife f. Simone
Transatlanticism - Death Cab for Cutie
Weapon Of Choice [Explicit] - Fatboy Slim
Munich - Editors
Work It - Missy Elliott
Thank You - Dido
Ready 2 Wear - Felix da Housecat
Lucky And Unhappy - AIR
This is Where it All Begins - Plasticman
One More Time - Daft Punk
Mainframe - Kaada
Never Coming Home (Gonna Live My Life Remix) - Sting
Superstar - Jamelia
Wound Up - Office
Lose Yourself [Explicit] - Eminem
Closer [Explicit] - Nine Inch Nails
Night In My Veins (Album Version) - The Pretenders
Accepting Applications At University - Lilys
A Little Less Conversation (JXL Radio Edit Remix) - Elvis Presley
Touch the Sky - Kanye West f. Lupe Fiasco
Hello - Poe
Lady Marmalade - Christina Aguilera, Maya, Pink, Lil' Kim f. Missy Elliott
Thinking About Your Axe-Wound - Joel Veitch
Outer Bongolia - Stereolab
The Man Comes Around - Johnny Cash
Cooldown: There There (The Boney King of Nowhere) - Radiohead
August Day Song (King Britt Remix) - Bebel Gilberto (Thanks, Calvin.)

Saturday, September 02, 2006

America! F*ck yeah!

Week-end Total: 30 miles

Distance: 16 miles
Duration: 02.25
Weight: 163 lbs.
Stretches: yes
Drink: Gatorade
Meal: pasta alfredo (one hour before) + Balance Bar Triple Threat (half-hour before)
Time: 3.40pm
Weather: cool & rainy

That Gets My Heart (131 BPM) - dj steveboy
"Sixty-one minutes of digital Red Bull."

Exultant (152 BPM) - dj steveboy
"Another one that pushes and then breaks on through (I'd say to the other side, but you know....)"

The official end of summer in this neck of the nape is the Air Show. As I was running down Little Italy, the Heights were buzzed by some large, loud, military aircraft. At first I thought it was on my iPod,, this big roaring sound. The stereo effect was pretty intense - it was over my head!

The happy-happy joy-joy news of the week is that not only did I get two good water stops, I got two pee breaks. The tennis courts where East Blvd. becomes MLK Blvd. feature a port-a-john. I spotted that two weeks ago ... but didn't think I wanted to check out a lonely port-a-john at 5:30 in the morning.

Three-car pile-up on MLK, caught that both ways. Pretty ugly.

Hitting the Shoreway again, I took it west to East 55th Street before heading back. The waves were crashing, it was exhilarating. I almost took the few steps down to the breaker to catch some spray ... but knew I'd probably catch a wave instead. It was already pretty moist, I didn't want my shoes all soggy.

The trip was mostly incredible. Around mile 14 I thought "I can do this! I can do this!" Shortly thereafter I just lost it. I kept going, it was a great run, but I think I psyched myself out. The last two miles were a biatch.

Running on a cool afternoon is so much more effective than 5 in the morning. I am already a little limber, my system is running normally ... but I hate taking three hours of a day off to do this, when there is a family to be with and chores to be done. That, and I am a freaking zombie.

UPDATE: Googled "marathon training advice" and found this blog entry from two years ago. All the comments she received were pretty inspirational. Check it.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

This Tower's leaning over

Week-end total: 32.5 miles

Distance: 15 miles
Duration: 02:22
Weight: 164 lbs.
Stretches: yes
Cooldown walk: yes
Sports drink: yes
Snack: PowerBar Triple Threat
Time: 5.15am
Weather: balmy & humid with occasional light rain

"GTC Megamix"
Too Much Information - Duran Duran
Slow Down - Backbeat Band
Unbelieveable - EMF
Push Th' Little Daisies - Ween
Evenflow - Pearl Jam
The Pink Room - Angelo Badalamente
Good Stuff - The B-52s
Just Keep Me Moving - k.d. lang
I Don't Want to Grow Up - The Ramones
Long View - Green Day
I Was Dancing in the Lesbian Bar - Jonathan Richman
Rock In the Pocket (Song of David) - Suzanne Vega
All That She Wants - Ace of Base
If I Can't Change Your Mind - Sugar
Missing (Terry Todd Remix) - Everything But the Girl
F*ck and Run - Liz Phair
Steam - Peter Gabriel
The Globe - Big Audio Dynamite
The Things That I Used to Do - G. Love & Special Sauce
Theme from "Northern Exposure" - David Schwartz
Sexy M.F. - Prince
Hey Jealousy - Gin Blossoms
Regret - New Order
Too Funky - George Michael
Informer - Snow
Night In My Veins - The Pretenders
Mr. Bitterness - Soul Coughing
Lifetime Piling Up - Talking Heads
Cantaloop (Flip Fantasia) - Us3
Buried at Sea - MC 900 Ft Jesus
Stay (Faraway, So Close!) - U2
Gypsy Woman (She's Homeless) - Crystal Waters
The More You Ignore Me - Morissey
Hello City - Barenaked Ladies

"These teeth are white, trainers ultra-bright." - DD

We reached the beach today. Okay, not quite, where I live you aren't allowed near the beach, they put airports and highways there, because this city is dumb. But I ran, I saw the lake, and then I came home. Yay oh me.

Warning: Scatalogical Info

Is it just me, or is long-distance running all about where to take a dump? I'm am trying to push the enevelope here, 13 was attainable, what's another two miles, but I was hampered early on by an uncomfortable need to poo. The wife's suggestion that I drink a little coffee before warm-ups has been quite successful, until this morning.

Part of the problem, of course, if that I have been rising at 4:30 for these extra long runs, because I can't afford to take weekend time away from the kids. Okay, also because it's been so freaking hot the past two months. So there's absolutely nowhere open, no restaurants or stores that I can duck into and take care of business.

No, I had no disaster, just a lot of discomfort and short stretches where I had to walk it off. I may need to wait at least an hour after rising before heading out, so that I know I am prepared.

Saturday, July 29, 2006

Sunrise over Bong Hill


Week-end Total: 21 miles

Distance: 9 miles (oops.)
Stretches: yes
Sports drink: yes
Snack: PowerBar
Time: 5:45am
Weather: balmy

"Breaking Point" Playlist:
Just Like Heaven - The Cure
Heal the Pain - George Michael
I Want Your (Hands On Me) - Sinead O'Connor
I Am Stretched On Your Grave - Sinead O'Connor
Hard Day (Shep Pettibone Remix) - George Michael
Alphabet Street - Prince
Pictures of You - The Cure
No Sleep Till Brooklyn - The Beastie Boys
King for a Day (12" Version) - XTC
Reptile - The Church
Don't Wanna Fall in Love - Jane Child
Sign O the Times - Prince
I.O.U. - The Replacements
Pop Song 89 - R.E.M.
Hand to Mouth - George Michael
Lonesome For A Place I Know - Everything But the Girl
Hey Jack Kerouac - 10,000 Maniacs
Cloudbusting - Kate Bush
Cooldown: Night and Day - U2

WARNING: Potty Talk

I would prefer to run in the afternoon or evening, when my body isn't stiff as a board. I run early because 1) that's when I have time 2) it's too darn hot. The problem, of course, are facilities.

I have learned a lot about running marathons. For example, since I have no chance of winning, I should focus on simply getting there. Walking is not cheating. Eating and drinking while running is not cheating. And stopping to go to the bathroom is not cheating. Unless you're from Kenya, you're not going to reach the finish line fast enough to neglect necessary bodily functions.

I tried going to the bathroom before the run, but sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't. I knew there would be a restroom facility by the new recreation center where I could get a mid-run drink, but would the bathrooms be open at 6am? By mile three I was in need, and had no friendly neighbors to let me into their home. Praise Bob, the john was unlocked. Let's hear it for Athens, Ohio, where anyone, even a man of the cloth, can find what they are looking for in a public facility before dawn.

We are visiting the Out-Laws, and I took the bike path by the Hocking River. Not too many gnats, but a few. Went out at dark, past the hospital, my old rooms on South Green, and then way out past all the depressing "big box" developments and back again as the greenskeepers were sweeping the links. I miscalculated and actually ran nine miles instead of the scheduled eight. Oh well. The weather was perfect.

The folks installed a sun shower behind the garage last summer, so I had a remarkable cooldown, just me, the trees, the deer and open pores.

Thursday, July 13, 2006

Oh, poop.

Distance: 4 miles
Weight: 167 lbs.
Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Snack: yes
Weather: cool & overcast
Time: 6:30am

Okay, here's a story. I went out with some old college friends Wednesday night. I did a little drinking, not too much, more than I should if I am planning on running the next morning. And I was out too late, I was up until one. But I drank an awful lot of water at that bar, we were outside so I wasn't inhaling much smoke. I'll avoid such situations in the future, but there I was.

I wake up around six and decide, all right, I can do this. I try stretching well before the run, I got a little flop-sweat going. I had downloaded an "encouragement" mix from iTunes, you have this perosnal trainer telling you when to pick up and cool down, etc.

I have a four-mile circle mapped out from my house. A big circle, out to Newbury (past the girl's school,) up Mayfield, down Noble, and home.

A bout half-way from home, I have to void. Seriously. I try to bear down, but it just gets worse. I another quarter-mile, I am in big, big trouble. I cut down a side-street in a pointless atempt to get home faster, but that just makes it worse, mentally. And I have a voice in my head (well, on my iPod) saying "Go for it!" and "Visualize your goal!"

I am freaking desperate and am assessing the foliage by the elementary school I am jogging past. Luckily for me, it was trash morning in that neighborhood, and this young guy in a tie is dragging a length of carpet out to the curb.

I said excuse me, and he say yes, and I said, I hate to ask this but I really need to use your bathroom. He hestitated for a moment in that way that made me feel as though, if my skin tone had been any different from his, he would have said no.

"Oh, all right," he said, and led me through the back of his house, and into his basement, where I found salvation. It was even a new bathroom, they were doing the basement. I think they were rehabbing the entire house.

On my way out I tried not to catch his wife's eye. "Love what you've done with the place," I said, and slunk away.