How young are you? How old am I?

In the early-mid 80s we produced a comedy program for local access cable. This is a video retrospective of three years of sub-par hilarity.

My, but it was FREAKISHLY balmy this evening! I had hoped to run in the sunshine (hello, yes) but after four hours of giving workshops in Shakespeare I discovered the sun had set and feared that the temperature would dip considerably. It didn't. I overdressed, but it was marvelous. Three miles winding through the side streets of CH.

Tomorrow is the last time (hopefully) I need to wake up at 5 am, for a while. And no rehearsal Saturday! Looking forward to checking out Josh & Kelly's show at CPT on Saturday night - join me! There will be blood!!!!

1984 Playlist
Dance Halls Days [12" version] - Wang Chung
I Will Dare (167 bpm) - The Replacements
Cue Fanfare - Prefab Sprout
Two Tribes [12" version] - Frankie Goes to Hollywood
Harborcoat (157 bpm) - R.E.M.

Distance: 3 miles
Temperature: 40º
Weather: breezy, cool
Road conditions: slushy & wet
Weight: 162.5 lbs.

How come I end up where I started?

First day of training! And look - you can train yourself!



The fact that I took a run this morning at 5 am is no indication of my dedication to my sport. It is because I have no f*cking time. Next I am going to drop ten pounds my cutting off my head.



2007 Playlist
United State of Pop (2007) - DJ Earworm
Uninvited - Freemasons
Merrymaking At My Place - Calvin Harris
Girls and Boys In Love - The Rumble Strips
Henrietta - The Fratellis
15 Step - Radiohead

Distance: 2 miles
Temperature: 24º
Weather: lovely, light snowflakes
Road conditions: thick & slippery
Weight: 161 lbs.

To search, to find, to have, to hold

The temperature may rise above freezing on Wednesday. The streets are clear-ish, where snow remains it is even enough to may running just a little slippery, and in some cases pleasantly cushioned. Like running on a sandy beach. Only freezing.

My normal route goes out and around a familiar track, mostly level, but uses main arteries of traffic. With the snow entirely untouched in front of abandoned homes, it would be necessary to run in the street, which is stupidly dangerous on those streets. So I stick to the side-streets around my home, infrequently traveled and below the speed limit. Two miles is fine, next week I will need to raise that to three and will no doubt just do another circuit very near my house. Safe. Sane.

Initiating my running routine, prior to getting a gym membership in 1998, It was always such an endurance test getting up that first street. Was it my weight? Was it the fact that I still smoked? Well, it is only with modern technology that I have gone online and checked the elevation of that first street, and what do you know - it is steep!

I have been running it the past week. It is still steep! But not such an endurance test anymore.

1974 Playlist
Junior's Farm - Paul McCartney & Wings
Waterloo - ABBA
Killer Queen - Queen
You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet - Bachman-Turner Overdrive
Loose Booty - Sly & the Family Stone
Verb: That's What's Happening - Zachary Sanders

Distance: 2 miles
Temperature: 24º
Weather: face is freezing, torso sweaty. discuss.
Weight: 161.5 lbs.

Twice in two days? Sure, that's what a weekend is for.

You have got my favorite face

That's right, betches, I will be running the Cleveland this spring, 13.1 of it, anyhow. Me and not one - but three of my colleagues from work. My young, fit colleagues. Big sigh.

What is up with this city that they have a marathon in mid-May? Training officially begins Tuesday, so we are, all of us, training in the snow and sleet - those of us too cheap to have gym memberships. But I have to say, running on a treadmill is not a good way to train for a marathon, nor any road race. It's too gentle.

Today, the past two days, no, three, I have been achy and miserable physically. Today I have been sinking into bad sinus/migraine business. Getting out into the night air was a goal and it was extremely helpful. The cold did not even trouble me, the air was still, I just felt bright and strong. I could have added another mile tonight.

I will have to add that third mile soon enough, anyhow. I hope the winter is kind.

1994 Playlist
Locked Out - Crowded House
Mr. Bitterness - Soul Coughing
All that She Wants - Ace of Base
Ripper Sole - Stomp
Gel - Collective Soul
Supernova - Liz Phair

Distance: 2 miles
Temperature: 19º
Weather: clear & cold ... but not cold enough

When you're dead you don't take nothing with you but your soul

That was like a f*cking video game. There's this winter storm advisory going on, right? And it's been snowing and the traffic was ridiculous coming home and all I can think is - get these kids in bed, I am running in powdery snow. I'm geared for it.

The wife is worried, I am going to hurt my knees or something, I promised to stop if I was in any kind of soreness, but I planned to keep to the home route, a two-mile course going up and down the streets in my neighborhood, no distance, no big loop just weaving up and down these side streets. I can be in the street that way, head up, ears clear, ready for anything.

But the snowplows. I hit it just right, and those monsters (which I thought our city wasn't paying for, not for the side streets, not anymore) were going around each street - twice - and just when I was on them. So I was bounding through deep, unshoveled sidewalk snow and getting hit with the stuff these trucks were blowing in the air.

Crazy. I feel awesome, however. I had a nasty headache earlier ... due to lack of sleep, I think. And eyestrain.

I'm going to bed now.

1969 Playlist
The Ballad of John and Yoko - The Beatles
Suspicious Minds - Elvis Presley
One - Three Dog Night
Undun - The Guess Who
You Can't Always Get What You Want - The Rolling Stones

How the hell did I put together a set from 1969 with no repeats from last year?

Distance: 2 miles
Temperature: 25º
Weather: snowy
Weight: 162.5 lbs.

Time to get stupid

Citizens of Monticello Road, I am putting you on notice.

I am insane. That is insane business. And I LOVE IT.

Fact is, I would much rather run in unbroken snow than the winding trail of people hiking through the unshoveled drifts. Much less likely to break my ankle, or slip and fall ... but it does mean picking up my legs, hoisting up those knees. Really, two miles is enough. Really.

1989 Playlist
Steppin' to the A.M. - 3rd Bass
Veronica - Elvis Costello
Eye Know - De La Soul
Sin (Long) - Nine Inch Nails
King For A Day (12" Version) - XTC

Distance: 2 miles
Temperature: 25º
Weather: at least it's not 18º
Weight: 160.5 lbs.

You know you live in Cleveland when ... there's a two hour wait to dine at a place that serves fried cheese sandwiches.

On the Ten

2009 Playlist
United State of Pop 2009 (Blame It On The Pop) - DJ Earworm
Don't Stop Believin' - The Kids from "Glee"
Sugar - Flo Rida ft. Wynter
Jai Ho! (You Are My Destiny) - A.R. Rahman ft. The Pussycat Dolls
I Like You So Much Better When You're Naked - Ida Maria
Rehab - The Kids from "Glee"

I usually wait until February to begin the XX Playlists for XX Years cycle. But I can't, not this year. I am already stir-crazy, and getting out into the insanely cold temperatures is the only way to defeat them.

Two signs you are old in 2010:
Whining about modern interpretations of classic fictional detectives.
Whining about modern interpretations of classic hits by Journey.

Distance: 2 miles
Temperature: 18º
Weather: cold. snow. what have you.
Weight: 162.5 lbs.

New Year's Resolution: Do you have to eat that? I have officially gained 15 pounds since last January. This is not necessary.

Over the holiday weekend, two of my (young) co-workers were fb'ing about doing The Cleveland. I asked if it were a private party and (one of them) said "Sure!"

So I guess I am running The Cleveland, or half of it, this spring. It always falls around the boy's birthday. Training begins next week. Wish me luck, or something.