Horizon Two Mile Loop

We are in self-quarantine. Regardless, there is nowhere to go. The gym is closed, everything is closed. There is a pandemic. Who knew I would write these words? But here we are. The Coronavirus Pandemic of 2020.

We are well, I think. The wife shows cold symptoms. I was exhausted one week ago, spent the day home from work. It concerned me. I was not in any kind of pain or discomfort. Just weary. The next day I was fine.

Sunday I woke with pain in my neck and shoulders. No symptoms but muscle pain -- which can be a symptom My arms were sore last Thursday and Friday but, duh, I'd been doing weight machines on Wednesday. No other symptoms now, just soreness in my neck. That happens to me when I am under stress. It's not unusual. Is it?

The boy has asked me to run for weeks, but it is he who cannot, because he pulled a muscle in his chest. But today we run.

Distance: 2.3 miles
Duration: 24:32
Pace: 10:39
Route: Horizon Loop
Temperature: 42°
Climate: overcast & cool
Mood: good

He's gotten so much stronger, so much endurance. He wants to do good work. My ankle barked with pain after about a quarter mile, but I walked through it and kept going and it subsided. I do not trust this ankle.

We ran in pace, my son and I. It is a blessing.

Distance: 3 miles
Route: Rec Center
Mood: all right

Beautiful day. Maybe run?

Distance: 3 miles
Duration: 29:56
Pace: 9:58
Route: Forest Hill Run
Temperature: 45°
Climate: sunny & cool
Mood: all right

Ran two miles, had to walk parts of the third. It's a long road back.

First 5K

I have been taking Zoloft (sertraline) since I completed the Chicago marathon. A great deal of my current anxiety was triggered by the loss of my mother, having lost her I am not sure if I need to continue taking this medication. On the other hand, that's probably because the medication makes me feel all right.

The last time I took an antidepressant was during the year 2011, a year I gained weight and ran half as much, check it and see. And I have again gained weight and have little to no interest in running. Thankfully, I have a son who has recently come into his own physical fitness routine, as an aspiring high school wrestler, and asks me to run with him. And I say yes.

Today he ran his first 5K, and I ran one, too.

Distance: 3.2 miles
Duration: 34:00
Pace: 10:40
Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 39°
Climate: sunny, cool
Mood: good
Weight: 183.5 lbs.

Life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes.

The boy landed on his back and neck during wrestling practice, had the wind knocked out of him but otherwise seemed all right. It worries me. We went for a short run this afternoon. He wanted to stop after once around the block. I was overdressed, so changed into shorts and headed out again on my own.

Distance: .85 miles
Route: once around the block
Temperature: 48°
Climate: sunny & cool

Nice run, beautiful outside, but it left me winded. Had to walk - twice - on my way up Mayfield. So it goes.

Distance: 2.15 miles
Route: Horizon Loop

What's That Lyric?
Wake Me Up - Avicii

New beginnings.

Yes, I saw Brittany Runs a Marathon. I was curious as to how it walks the line between celebrating such an achievement and loving the body you're in, and I am happy to report that it does a pretty good job at illustrating that those are two different things.

And it made me cry, and fuck you, it made me cry. Because running a marathon is hard, and I never knew how hard until last year and it made me never want to run ever again.

Or maybe it was because I watched my mother die and that made me never want to do anything ever again.

So, we're doing something different. I am going to run whenever. No goals, no races, no marathons. Not now, maybe not ever again, who knows. But I have a daughter who runs and I have a son who is now run-curious. And if they can get me to run, who am I to say no?

Happy New Year.

Distance: 2.35 miles
Duration: 25:00
Pace: 10:42
Route: Horizon Loop
Temperature: 33°
Climate: cool
Mood: good, thanks

He and I. We ran. No stopping. It's a whole new world.

Before I go forever.

Wearing it.

It has been quite a month. I feel selfish taking a run on this particular afternoon, but I haven't exercised, at all, since the marathon. And that's not good, either.

Distance: 2 miles
Duration: 17:51
Pace: 8:55
Route: Horizon Loop
Temperature: 40°
Climate: sunny & cool
Mood: ???

So, here's the deal. Shortly after the race I began taking Wellbutrin (bupropion) for anxiety and depression. The effect was almost immediate, with some bizarre though not unpleasant side effects. However, after a few weeks I began experiencing chest pains which were presumably muscular, not vascular in nature. And yet, the toll emotionally was extreme, this "heart attack lite," and so we decided to make a change.

Now I am taking Zoloft (sertraline) which is also effective, but the jury is still out as to whether I am going to stick with it. Simply put, I feel less inspired than usual, which was what I always worried would happen on antidepressants.

However, the last time I took a session of meds was eight years ago. In 2011 I wrote two plays, which was two more plays than I had written the year before. I also ran half as much as the annual average and gained a great deal of weight.

So here we are. Today the wife texted me to say how beautiful it is outside, and she was right. It was, is gorgeous. And I ran.

What's That Lyric?
The Night - Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons