I keep trying. I’m not lying.

Good lord. The very first thing I did this morning was pay for something with a credit card. Terrible night's sleep (snoring) I checked my email, the local independent movie series sent a renewal query and I paid it.

Local business, yes. But with a credit card. Fuck. I can't even boycott right. 

Distance: 24:35

Duration: 3 miles

Because I slept on the couch and was running "pink noise" (makes me think of pink slime, gross) I needed to charge my phone before heading to the gym super early. Then I discovered my earbuds needed charging ... after one lap. So I left.

Also, I discovered I had a flat tire. Not kidding. This day came at me hard.

Mood: better now
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 169 lbs.

1988 Playlist

Blue Monday '88 (12" Version) - New Order

Joy and Pain - Rob Base & DJ EZ Rock

Fuck Tha Police - N.W.A.

Was It Worth It? (12” Mix) - Pet Shop Boys

Microphone Fiend - Erik B. & Rakim

We finish the day strong, just like we do. And I didn't buy anything else but a lip balm that I paid for in cash from a cornershop.

I'm like a spinning top going round and around.

As many months in February -- a short month -- as in January. Even through illness. Remarkable. It's quite a year already. We are creating, yes. We are engaging with the world, yes. We are finding satisfaction through our work, mostly, yes. We are loving and living and communicating, yes.

But what of March? Moving forward? Or relapse? 

Distance: 4 miles

Duration: 33:32

Taking a puff is fun, but it really means the day is over for me. And I have to make sure I am not compelled to consume. That's where Noom is helpful. If I have hit the "finish the day" button then I have a reason not to eat anything else. Or drink, the other night I thought, sure! A second beer would be fine, right? And then I really thought about it and decided in my state a can of fizzy water would taste the same, and so I had one of those.  

Of course, then there are those nights nights you’re totally straight and think, three beers? Sure, that always works for me. Jesus.

Mood: hoo-boy
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 160 lbs.

1978 Playlist

One For You, One For Me - La Bionda

My Best Friend's Girl - The Cars

I Know But I Don’t Know - Blondie

Peanuts - The Police

Spinning Top - XTC

What a Fool Believes - Doobie Bros.

Atmosphere - Joy Division

Chase - Giorgio Moroder

Got To Get You Into My Life - Earth Wind & Fire 

Damn! This playlist. Oh! And I watched the Yacht Rock doc. Surprised to discover they played it straight.

I’m not trying to run your life.

My cold is almost through. I feel fine, but the snot just keeps collecting in my throat and my sinuses. Last night, I spit up an oyster the size of a silver dollar.

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 26:21

It is fifty degrees today. I could run outside. But there may be slush.   

Mood: all right
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 160 lbs.

1968 Playlist

(Poor Mi) Israelites - Desmond Dekker & The Aces

Suzanne - Leonard Cohen

Savoy Truffle - The Beatles

Ain’t Nothin’ But a Houseparty - The Showstoppers 

I Say a Little Prayer -Aretha Franklin 

Who’s Making Love - Johnnie Taylor

Birthday - The Beatles

Street Fighting Man - The Rolling Stones 

The Horse - Cliff Nobles

Astral Weeks - Van Morrison 

I feel hot and cold.

Crises big, crises small. And I remain so cold. Just walking around, even at work, even at home. Cold feet. cold head. Still stuffed up. Had a bit of a relapse, though I may chalk it up to a steady diet of Benadryl.

The next week will be spent on my own. I need to make plans in advance, where I'm going to eat, how I am going to spend my evenings.

And when, exactly, I will gym.

Distance: 1.6 miles

Duration: 14:31

TIL on Saturday the gym closes at five. No matter, I was feeling not so great and was going to stop at two miles, anyway. No, really.

Mood: okay
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

1973 Playlist

I Can't Explain - David Bowie

All the Way From Memphis - Mott the Hoople

Right Place Wrong Time - Dr. John

Paris 1919 - John Cale

20th Century Boy - T.Rex

Sundown on the Union

It took illness to break up a very respectable every-other-day visit to the rec center. I suppose it was inevitable. I have been eating less mindfully, it's a slide, that's okay. It's so cold outside (which is a good thing, winter is necessary) and comfort food is a thing. But I need more fresh vegetables.

Fresh vegetables are by their very nature cold. And it feels counterintuitive to consume something that is cold when you feel cold, or have a cold. Why not some fried starch thing instead?

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 23:30

Yes, that was my pace. A rare after work run at the rec center, just as I started a runners group took the track. I was instructed to get into the slower lanes. Even though I was faster than most of them.

Faster than I usually am.

I was sick for a week. I am already starting to regret this.

Shit, that was fast.

I hope I never see those people again.

Mood: malaise
Stretches: yes
Water: not enough

Weight: 161 lbs.

1983 Playlist

Stand Back - Stevie Nicks

Wrap It Up - Eurythmics

Union Sundown - Bob Dylan

Home By the Sea - Genesis

On the Dark Side - John Cafferty & the Beaver Brown Band

A Ray of Sunshine - Wham!

Move it nice and sweet and sexy.

The other night I had a lovely conversation with the wife, and for some reason I mentioned running and how much I love it. We were talking about our general health and I recalled that day's exercise and I was overcome with how much I enjoy moving through space like that. And it's silly, to just run. "What is the point?" folks ask. And it is truly an end unto itself. Just being ambulatory in that way.

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 25:22

Mood: Driven
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 161 lbs.

1993 Playlist

If - Janet Jackson

Are You Gonna Go My Way - Lenny Kravitz

Where I’m From - Digable Planets

Jump Around - House of Pain

Show Me Love - Robin S

Who Am I (What’s My Name) - Snoop Dogg

I Like To Move It - Reel 2 Real ft. The Mad Stuntmen

Tragic youth was looking young and sexy.

The rec center membership is paying for itself. This winter has been a proper one, first in ages it seems, with freezing temperatures and icy sidewalks. 

I have a feeling that spring will bring with it a national disaster the likes of which we have not yet seen. I don't normally like to point to the fences like that, but there's no way this continues without horrific repercussions.

You see? I am paying attention.

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 25:39

Things in the running lane this morning:

Conversation between three people

Someone taking a photograph

The feet of a guy doing sit-ups 

Also, young person walking the wrong walk up the walkers lane then sprinting like a crazed person (in the correct direction) weaving through all the rest of us like an asshole.

Route: rec center 
Mood: maintaining
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 160 lbs.

2003 Playlist

Molly's Chambers - Kings of Leon

Go Brown - Kaada

Kernkraft 400 (DJ Gius Mix) - Zombie Nation

Tour De France - Kraftwerk

Reality - David Bowie

Running Up That Hill - Placebo

Beware - Jay Z ft. Punjabi MC

Did two miles without stopping for water, that's new. It was the music, friends!

You just had a salad today.

It's just cold. I'm just cold.

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 26:31
Route: Rec Center
Mood: distant
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 162 lbs.

2013 Playlist

Tangled Up (Lokee Remix) - Caro Emerald

Donatella - Lady Gaga

Little Talks - Of Mice and Men

Hot Cheetos and Takis - Da Rich Kidzz 

Goodbye Horses - Q Lazzarus 

Chocolate - The 1975

Love Somebody - Maroon 5

******* ***** - ***** ******

My year playlists are long. For 2013, it's 4 hours and 17 minutes. The lists from my teen years are four time that long. They're played on shuffle, you may assume, but I try to start with a song that I have added since last year. Every year, new songs, for every year.

I've said this before but it bears repeating. Doing this, going through every year of my life, year by year, has motivated me (more than I might have otherwise) to keep up with contemporary music. And that keeps my young and healthy and much less of an asshole about music than guys my age usually are.

My heart runs on gasoline vapors.

Saw PARADE on Tuesday night. I have thoughts.

Those cats. My familiar is not doing well, and sleeps with me, without moving, every night. Just an old man cat. And the little one won't leave us alone. I haven't had unbroken sleep in I don't know when. 

Just keep running.

Distance: 3 miles 

Duration: 26:31

160 is really the sweet spot. I feel so much better. At the same time, I also feel as though my bones appreciated the additional padding.  

Route: Rec Center
Mood: all things considered …
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 160 lbs.

To the threes.

2023 Playlist

There You Are (Beautiful) - Kiss The Tiger

Hot To Go! - Chappell Roan

The Smoke - Nabaté Isles

An Arrow in the Wall - Death Cab for Cutie

Personal Jesus - Iggy Pop ft. Trevor Horn & Lambrini Girls

Girls Talk - Tegan & Sara

$20 - Boy Genius

Lipstick Lover - Janelle Monáe

Why do they run away?

Monday would have been a lovely day for a run (mid 50s) but there' only so much you can do in a week.

On my own a few days this week. The cats woke me Monday morning at 12:30 AM and I knew it was pointless trying to go back to sleep, so I watched I Saw the TV Glow. And that was the perfect time of day to watch that.

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 25:31

Yesterday, I created a special household surprise for my love (I don't know if she visits the blog so I'm keeping what I did a secret) but I think she's going to be very pleased.  And I went to see Emelia Pérez, and just in time, I guess. Why do so many people have to be so racist?

Route: Rec Center
Mood: angsty
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 161 lbs.

2019 Playlist

Spooky Coochie - Doechii

Seconds - LCD Soundsystem

I’ll Be Back Someday - Tegan and Sara

Hold On - Ames

Ants - Tang and the Bangas

Blackout (acoustic) - Frank Turner

Moderation - Florence the Machine

Saw Lightning - Beck

Put on a smile and it will be all right.

The other day Andrew Hickey referred to the Civil War as the Slaveholders Rebellion, which I had never heard before.

It took a quick Google search to discover that this term as coined by Frederick Douglass in 1862. All right, then. I have learned something new.

Let's make this Black History Month one to remember.

Distance: 3 miles

Duration: 25:41
Route: Rec Center
Mood: all right
Stretches: yes
Water: yes

Weight: 164 lbs.

2009 Playlist

S&M - Rihanna

Surprise Hotel - Fool’s Gold

Heads Will Roll (A-Trak Remix) - Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Sea of Heartbreak - Roseanne Cash ft. Bruce Springsteen 

Something Good 08 - Utah Saints

The Fear - Lily Allen

The Rain - Calvin Harris