Resolution

No, I have not run since Thanksgiving weekend. There has been absolutely no exercise going on here. I do not weight any more than I did (holding steady at 167 lbs.) but I have changed shape. I have had daytime fantasies about doing a push-up, but it's always when I am walking from one place to another, when I am in a relatively private place and not in motion, it never occurs to me.

I need to drop in the middle of the hall in the Bulkley Building and give a good twenty crunches. Everyone would love to see that.

There are good reasons - actual, true, non-pathetic excuse good reasons not have run during large parts of the last month. I have been ill. Maybe you do not wish to read any further, but it is running and general health related. Previous I had a battle with extreme and entrenched Plantar warts, which grew all out of proportion and threatened to take over the world. I actually ran the 2006 NY Marathon with a mosaic on my instep and a smaller one on my big toe. The things we do for love.

With the assistance of talented doctors (unlike that quack who used to be my GP and tortured me when I first asked for her help in this matter) they were vanquished in 2008. I have actually blogged about that.

Recently however, I found a new on on the pad of my right foot (same foot! same, poor foot!) and decided that, rather than ignoring it as I had done with the previous incarnation, I would take matters into my own hands and treat it vigorously with medication left over from the previous skirmish.

Sorry for all the war metaphors. It is the only fighting I do. Me against skin viruses.

However, this time I was defeated by the medication. FORMALAZ is simply a solution of formaldehyde. And after a few weeks of successful treatment, one evening my foot blew up like a balloon. My left, too, puffed up and I could not sit up or walk. I was put on a series of antibiotics and anti-inflammatory drugs and told not to exercise for a while. So I didn't.

It is possible this story has a happy ending - the wart may be gone. I am not sure, it's a wait-and-see game. But it is no longer an excuse not to be running.

Also, I have been writing. Actual writing, the first draft of the new script is largely intact, if not complete. Time I spend in the early evening or early morning is spent with children, being Christmassy, washing dishes, making excellent meals, being homebound and happy.

And again, there no longer exists a compulsion to move. My serotonins are successfully entering my neurons. I am without crippling anxiety.

However, this must stop. It is not healthy for me to be sedentary. I do not fit comfortably into my jeans - this has more to do with shape than weight. But weight is an issue. I have a target of 155 and intend to hit it by April 7 - if that is the opening date of my solo performances, though it may change, we haven't gotten final word on that.

A new year approaches. I want to join a gym and do running indoors, I think that may be a motivating factor. Resuming the outreach tour always makes me drop a few pounds. And once the holidays pass there will be more time.

Ha ha, that was a little joke. There is never more time.

But I am optimistic for 2011. How could I not be? The past year has been an emotional challenge, a professional challenge, a personal challenge, and a global challenge. I am pissed off and thrilled and confident and boy am I busy. And I like busy.

I also like running. I should do something about that.

What was I talking about?