You keep me running round and round.

We voted!

I will be in a state on anxiety until strike tonight is complete.

Then, who knows. Relaxation? We shall see. But it has been a great weekend.

Distance: 3.75 miles

Duration: 32:18
Pace: 8:36

SIXTEEN runs in October! FUCK yeah!

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 59°
Climate: light clouds & cool: ideal
Mood: good, actually

Monster Bash!

Living On the Ceiling - Rosetta Stone

Too Many Creeps -  Bush Tetras

Watching -Thompson Twins

Bloodletting (The Vampire Song) - Concrete Blonde

Red Right Hand - Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds

Unmarked Helicopters - Soul Coughing

You Want It Darker - Leonard Cohen

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 165 lbs. (+2.0)

Enjoy myself the past few days, eating out, eating a lot of good stuff, fish fry and burgers. Time to relax into vegetables again. It has been a celebration! 

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

I have had chapped lips for a week. The greasy food is NOT helping.

I'm a lyrical poet.

Twenty years ago today, I ran five miles and the only thing I posted was the header "That sucked." I believe the reason for this was an argument my wife and I had right before heading out that made me miserable.

An anonymous commentator, one who had been following my my progress, wrote:

Well, what did you expect? You didn't stretch or drink. You listened to no music, it took no time and you weighed nothing.

He also added:

Seriously, keep going, guy. You've trained, you've done the work. You will survive this.

I really appreciated that. I think that was my brother.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:08
Pace: 8:44

We made it to Thursday, and then I collapsed. Work at 3 AM with a headache. Slept too warm, got up, took pain reliever, didn't make any difference. Called off work. I feel bad about that, of course, but it/s noon and I still feel like shit.

This is becoming a regular thing now and I do not care for it. Then again, what I particularly do not care for is conducting a five day residency. It's very taxing for me now, on my feet for five hours, engaging somewhat disinterested students, using my voice a lot.

And Death of a Salesman. I mean, come on.

Anyway, I'm hoping a run will drive this out of me.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 72°
Climate: sunny & hot
Mood: good! but my head hurts!

Fall 1990 Mixtape
Praying For Time - George Michael

I'm Your Baby Tonight - Groove Is In the Heart - Deee-Lite

Dance of the Dream Man - Angelo Badalamenti

Feels Good - Tony! Toni! Toné!

Policy of Truth - Depeche Mode

We have begun shedding weight. For the moment I have become accustomed to eating less and getting anxious about any additional intake. I need to find the right balance. I can feel it in my hips, my end, my legs.

Of course, as I said, I have also been standing this week, a lot more than usual.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 163 lbs. (+0.2)

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

Went the distance.

It's a big week. I'm teaching the Death of a Salesman residency, the same residency I was teaching twenty-five years ago. It's changed a little, not much. The kids haven't changed much, either. It's a bit surprising to hear high school juniors in Chagrin Falls remarking about how bad the economy is, but I guess I'm glad they know. 

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 28:03
Pace: 9:02

Anyway, five classes a day is a lot for me now. I mean, it's fine. It's a drag. Four classes back to back ... then a ninety minute break followed by a fifth class. It's a long day on my feet.

Then I need to jet downtown to take care of time-sensitive business (see: writing contest) and help how I can with the show.

The show! My show, that is going up this weekend! Another show! Goodness, what a month. Monday we're going to Cincinnati to see the boy play. I am looking forward to that, a little vacation after all this business.

We're still not drinking. How long have I ever gone without drinking, smoking, taking antianxiety medication, or all the rest? Ts. Remarkable.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 65°
Climate: beautiful!!!
Mood: good

So, what was I listening to at that time when I began high school. It went a little something like this.

Fall 1982 Mixtape

Pressure - Billy Joel

Shock the Monkey - Peter Gabriel

Eye of the Tiger - Survivor

Don't You Want Me- Human League

Tainted Love - Soft Cell

You Dropped a Bomb On Me - The Gap Band

Hot in the City - Billy Idol (Cleveland!)

Yes. We were young and anxious.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 162.8 lbs. (-2.4)

It's been a beautiful week, I'll give you that. We have to leave for classes before the sun comes up, so an afternoon run it is.

And I have been most responsible, not only preparing lunches for the entire week, preparing breakfast for the entire week! Fresh fruit, cut and frozen! What a good boy am I.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes

Sit-Ups: yes

I'd die without you.

Someone must explain to me these Saturday/Sunday headaches. I used to think o no, I had two drinks last night and now my head hurts. I am a bad person. But there is no drinking, no drugs. Just sleep. Must I wake up at five or six to have coffee on weekend mornings? I mean, I can do that. 

Then there is the old man, who disrupts me regularly. I just want to have a weekend free from discomfort and pain, alas.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:18
Pace: 8:48

Twenty years ago, I was in malaise, tapering, waiting for the big race. It was eleven days until the New York City Marathon.

Ever since the weather turned I have felt in limbo. Also, since the numbers started going down instead of up. Just treading water. Staying limber.

This week I will be attending evening rehearsals and teaching five classes a day. That's in addition to just taking care of house and spouse. I should be grateful I am not training for a marathon.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 47°
Climate: nice & cool
Mood: good

Moving in.

Fall 1992 Mixtape

Jeremy - Pearl Jam

Crucify * - Tori Amos

Rhythm Is a Dancer - SNAP!

Erotica - Madonna

I'd Die Without You * - P.M. Dawn

Don't Stop - Fleetwood Mac

This is when the 90s truly began.

Stretches: yes
Water: no. oops.
Weight: 165.2 lbs. (+0.2)

Ate whatever I wanted yesterday. Burrito, sushi, pizza. It was pretty cool.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: yes

I am not going out like any punk bitch.

2275 Professor Street
Then (1992) & Then (2018)
(coffee shop formerly known as Beviamo)

Cat kept me up all night. He can go months without sleeping with me, then he remembers how nice it is. And I am glad he still gets out of bed to pee. But then he wants back in.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:28
Pace: 8:51 

The next week will be a bear. I teach five classes a day, every day next week. It's going to be a drag.

Had a dream last night, I was leading a lesson but some kids who weren't paying attention were comparing tunes on transistor radios. I lost my temper, which is not my style, but they were so rude.

I said, "Give me the fucking radio."

And that was kind of it for the class.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 47°
Climate: cloudy & perfect 
Mood: all right

Fall 1992 Mixtape

Good Stuff - The B-52's

Too Funky (Extended) - George Michael

Jump Around - House of Pain

Baby Got Back - Sir Mix-A-Lot

Happiness in Slavery - Nine Inch Nails

Pretend We're Dead - L7

As summer leaned into fall that fateful year, we were preparing a space for performance. Crazy, right? I was 24 years old and starting a theater company. What a fantasy!

Yesterday, I was in that space. I was giving a rep from our sister company the nickel tour of CLE and came through Tremont to show off some thing. I bought him a coffee at Roasted, which is located in the former Professor Street Theater.

I also skipped lunch. Didn't mean to do that.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 165 lbs. (-0.4)

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes

Sit-Ups: yes

Twenty years ago, I ran fifteen miles by taking the five mile circuit around my house three times. I was tapering, I had already run the trek from my house to my parents' on Sept 30, and should have done another twenty but never did.

The blog post for this fifteen miler is the most visited post on my blog, three times as many visits as the post that comes in second. I attribute this to the fact that I listed every single track I listened to on my run, which is a lot and must show up on countless searches.

"I rose and dressed for cold. Welcome back butter beanie, welcome back bullethead. Yesterday I got new soles, new gloves (awesome gloves) and a new running hat."

I'm wearing those same awesome gloves today.

Again ... I said I was a time bomb.

Exhausted, distracted. A bit overwhelmed.

And that was before we watched the documentary.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:51
Pace: 8:59

The big, full days continue. And that's what you wanted, right?

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 42°
Climate: clear & cool
Mood: angsty

Since the show closed, I have had a pull in the left side of my neck. This may be because ... well, it may be because of a number of things. Stress has manifested itself in my neck many, many times -- but not for a long, long time.

Fall 1988 Mixtape

Don't Believe the Hype - Public Enemy
Wild, Wild West - Escape Club

What's On Your Mind (Pure Energy) - Information Society

Simply Irresistible - Robert Palmer

Chains of Love - Erasure

Talkin' Bout a Revolution - Tracy Chapman

What I Am - Edie Brickell & New Bohemians

Stretches: yes 
Water: yes
Weight: 165.4 lbs. (+0.6)

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

Your feet are going to be on the ground.

Late 1991

This past week has been an historic emotional epic. I was depressed and anxious in the lead up to these I Hate This house performances, which is entirely normal and to be expected, and then every single one of these performance was wonderful, and better than wonderful.

Diana came into town to see it. I can't begin to put into words how grateful I am.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:07
Pace: 8:45

And still. My wife and I are not out of the woods yet in this house, and I believe we never will be. I took a turn down a dark path to help someone very close to me. I told my shameful secrets. And I heard terrible truths. When, if ever, will we emerge?

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 42°
Climate: brisk, lovely!
Mood: troubled

We continue to run out of doors. I am not ready to commit to the rec center yet.

Yesterday

Fall 1988 Mixtape

What's the Matter Here - 10,000 Maniacs

Peek-A-Boo - Siouxsie & the Banshees

I Don't Want Your Love - Duran Duran

Stand - R.E.M.

Never Tear Us Apart - INXS

Desire - U2ny

It Takes Two - Rob Base & DJ EZ Rock

Fall 1988 was my first great mental breakdown. So much anger, so lost. So much shit I had brought down onto myself. The music will always be my friend.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 164.8 lbs. (+0.2)

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

Whatever words I say I will always love you.

A Facebook post from East Cleveland Mayor Sandra Morgan:

The restoration work has started in historic Forest Hill Park! I’m thankful for our partnership with the Metroparks and look forward to our work together: taking down dead and vulnerable trees, repairing the boathouse, clearing away bramble and more. There’s so much more to come: stay tuned!🌳

Can't tell you how excited I am about this. The former administration had the opportunity to engage the Metroparks in managing the park, but those negotiations fell apart.

I am glad to say I have met Morgan, and was thrilled when she was elected. East Cleveland is a city with a deep history and many great obstacles to overcome but she engenders a great deal of trust and I am looking forward to good things from her.

Distance: 3.1 mles

Duration: 26:22
Pace: 8:30

Performances of I Hate This continue. The last three dates are sold and oversold. A few days ago I was questioning the entire endeavor, and now I so content. I have made people laugh at the worst time in our lives (they cry, too) raised a couple hundred bucks for the Preeclampsia Foundation (make yours today) and gotten to work closely with new people.

What is not to absolutely love?

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 47°
Climate: overcast, getting chilly 
Mood: good

Fall 1989 Mixtape

Shadrach - Beastie Boys

Blame It On the Rain - Milli Vanilli

Lovesong - The Cure

Love In an Elevator - Aerosmith

Fools Gold - The Stone Roses

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 164.6 lbs. (-0-)

Been the exact same weight for three days running so I think my new scale is broken.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes

Sit-Ups: yes

One week ago I was full of anxiety about this endeavor. Then it opened and I felt great. Now I am full of anxiety because my ex-wife is coming to see it tonight.

Just kidding, that's amazing. I am full of apprehension but also joy. I'm full of all kinds of good things.

I'm not the kind of girl who likes to be alone.

We begin. A five-night run of I Hate This hosted in our own home. I've been wanting to bring this back to honor the 25th anniversary of the birth of our first child, and some time over the summer (probably when I was running) I got this idea.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:08
Pace: 8:45

FOREST HILL PARK UPDATE: Things are happening! Negotiations with Metroparks have reopened, and this week there has been a LOT of activity, pulling down rotten trees -- LOTS of rotten trees.

I will keep you updated.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 54°
Climate: cool, baby. idealk.
Mood: good!

Fall 1989 Mixtape
Sowing the Seeds of Love - Tears For Fears

Love Shack - The B-52's

Higher Ground - Red Hot Chili Peppers
Bust a Move - Young MC

One - Bee Gees

Miss You Much - Janet Jackson

Yeah, let's keep jamming with the seasonal playlists. Fall 1989, I was emerging into final form. Confident as an actor, as a theater artist, evolving as a cartoonist. A bit more responsible, living in a solo apartment, less anxious in my personal relationships. I was twenty-one, something resembling a man.

Then I turned a corner, in a moment of inspired self-confidence asked out a young woman, and the rest of my life began.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 164.6 lbs. (-1.6)

The Old Man (cat) kept me up a lot last night, which is okay. He's a sweet old cat. He sleeps with me under the covers but needs to go to the bathroom a couple times. Better to get out of bed than go in the bed, I guess.

But also, we have a neighbor up the street, I'd heard about him, but never heard hi, he revs his engine, constantly, at two in the morning. Crazy. 

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

Never was a story of more woe, than this of Romeo ...

Keep going.

Fuck. I'll come in again.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 28:14
Pace: 9:06

Oh! What a week. What a month! And here we go. I have a week of house performances starting tonight. Then there's the series against Tampa. Oh! Writing workshops, supervision, got to organize props for that other play.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 67°
Climate: muggy!
Mood: good

Eric Lee & Tracey Gilbert
"Romeo & Juliet"
Guerrilla Theater Company (1994)

Fall 1994 Playlist

Undone (The Sweater Song) (160 BPM) - Weezer

When I Come Around (Live at Woodstock 94) - Green Day
Cadillac - Combustible Edison

Come To My Window - Melissa Etheridge

Picture This - Blondie

Fade Into You - Mazzy Star

Prayer For the Dying - Seal

So many endings, so many new beginnings. The 90s were in full swing, the Late 90s were only just beginning.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 165.6 lbs. (-0.6)

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

Twenty-six years, on my way to hell.

Fall 1994 is about a lot of things. It's about both of them. Falling in an out of love again. Romeo & Juliet and walks though Harlem. Concerts and concerts and movies and parties and bad, bad acts. It was about being in my twenties.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:32
Pace: 8:52

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 59°
Climate: after the rain, just lovely 
Mood: good

This is what we listened to.

Fall 1994 Mixtape

Headstart For Happiness (162 BPM) - The Style Council

I Don't Understand Anything - Everything But the Girl

Gentleman Who Fell - Milla Jovovich

I Melt With You (156 BPM) - Modern English

Wish - Nine Inch Nails

Burn - Nine Inch Nails

Intermittently - Barenaked Ladies

As I cycle through songs from that auspicious season, you will notice they were not all released that season, but they were ours, at that time, as we shared them with one another (or angrily screamed the lyrics together in the car.)

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 166.2 lbs. (+2.6)

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes

Sit-Ups: yes

And now the rains. Last night's game was very exciting. I am also very glad I was not there in person, I don't fare well sopping wet and shivering.

Still. Guardians!

Then he ran.

"Lapdog"
Peter de Sève
The New Yorker
Oct. 12, 2026

Twenty years ago, I took a 48 hour trip to London to share I Hate This with members of the Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society (SANDS UK). It was a conference where the director wanted to pitch a tour of the show around Great Britain.

Yes, in the midst of marathon training, I took a very brief transatlantic journey. 

"A small man, on the another side of the planet, going for a run. Different air, different land, same pair of shoes."

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:40
Pace: 8:55

I tried some of that British Lucozade, a "performance energy drink" much like Gatorade. The name was originally Glucozade, get it? 

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 47°
Climate: cool & crisp
Mood: 

We are getting close to recreation center time. Not looking forward to it.

Fall 1983 Mixtape

Big Log - Robert Plant

Undercover (Of the Night)- Rolling Stones

Owner of a Lonely Heart - Yes

Stand Back - Stevie Nicks

Puttin' On the Ritz - Taco

Jacqueline Kennedy
Onassis Reservoir
October, 2023

Suddenly Last Summer - The Motels

I need to make a Fall 1994 Mixtape, full of all the things we were listening to in October 1994.

A lot of them would be from the mid 1980s.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 163.8 lbs. (-3.4)

It's weird we were in Arizona in early October, and then New York City in late October. Good times, for a few years there. Covid made us adventurous. I wonder if we will be like that again.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes

Sit-Ups: yes

Went to see a show last night. So strange not to obsess about having a cocktail. Because I just wasn't going to have one. I also didn't clean my plate, nor that plate of appetizers. But I ate well, all day. And now I weight fewer than 165 pounds, which was my goal.

How do I maintain this? Maybe it helps to be entirely anxious an distracted by things entirely out of my control. I hate this.

I'll burn me through Ohio.

Josh Ritter at The Rialto (2023)

Fall continues. Summer fades. The other night I listened to the playlist I made from the setlist of Josh Ritter at the Rialto in Tucson, Arizona. We saw him in October 2023, when we took the train to the Southwest.

Distance: 3.15 mile

Duration: 28:06
Pace: 8:55

The wife was surprised that was already three years ago, but I'm not. The past three years we did all the things we had been waiting to do ... the boy left for college so we went south. To celebrate twenty-five years of marriage we took the QM2 and spent time in London, last year we finally took the children to Europe.

A train, a boat, and a plane.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 50°
Climate: cool, baby
Mood: getting there

But Josh Ritter. It was cool and dry when we arrived in Arizona, but it was still fall, you know? After the sun set the night we checked in we stepped out onto the street to look around. We had no plans for that evening, nor the next. The Rialto was right across the street, and I saw his name and said, we could do that.

And we did. It was a magical evening.

Pearce, AZ (2023)

Josh Ritter at the Rialto 10 04 2023

Bandits

Feels Like Lightning

Wolves

For Your Soul

Me & Jiggs

Folk Bloodbath

Young Moses

Truth Is a Dimension (Both Invisible and Blinding)

Never seen anyone smile while singing in quite that way. He really loves this.

Our Southwestern journey, though. I have been many different places with my love but this was something truly unique. Like somewhere I had never been before. I had been to New Mexico, that's not what I mean, the atmosphere, but that's part of it. We found such strange and interesting places.

And it was so relaxed and peaceful. The skies were so wide and open, and so was the clock. It was intimate, expansive and amazing. 

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 167.2 lbs. (-0.2)

I passed on cheesecake twice yesterday. Just got to say no most days. Not all days. Just most.

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

What are we running for?

Still true.

Attended my 40 year high school reunion Saturday night. Good time. My clique was largely absent, got to chat with two at a pre-event on Friday, but without a home base I had to get over myself and mingle and catch up with, well, everyone else.

And I did. Some of them I knew but had never really had a conversation with, ever, not once, for the four, seven, maybe twelve years we had attended school together. Know what? We're all good people. 

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:32
Pace: 8:52

I did cut loose for a moment and began truth telling. It didn't go well. Party foul.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 55°
Climate: clear skies
Mood: good

Old friends.

Fall 1985 Mixtape

You Belong to the City - Glenn Frey

Don't Lose My Number (162 BPM) - Phil Collins

St. Elmo's Fire (Man In Motion) - John Parr

Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God) - Kate Bush

Invincible - Pat Benatar

The Whole of the Moon - The Waterboys

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 167.4 lbs. (-1.0) 

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA

I think I am over the zombies.

I thought that we'd always be friends.

Homecoming 1985

Attended the first evening of the big reunion weekend last night, and I am as insecure as I was as a teenager. I understand now that it comes off as arrogance. And I was arrogant, too, believe me. I think it's important that we have these rituals to remind us of how terrible we were and of how far we've come.

Or maybe, no. No. We don't actually need that.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:01
Pace: 8:42

Anyway, I left it to a couple hours before departing that I would actually go. I have become accustomed to ordering NA beers at bars now. No one cares. I am SO GLAD I didn't drink last night. I might still be there. I stayed about an hour an left, talking mostly to my closest though I worked very hard to reach out to those others.

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 57°
Climate: light clouds & perfect
Mood: f*cking driven

Fall 1985 Mixtape

Take on Me - a-ha

Fortress Around Your Heart - Sting

Pop Life - Prince & the Revolution

Kayleigh - Marillion

Head Over Heels  - Tears For Fears

The Sweetest Taboo - Sade

Miami Vice Theme - Jan Hammer

I mean. The 80s are fucking classic.

Today

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 168.4 lbs.

Switching to a digital scale has messed with my sense of self, and of what weight I should be, exactly. I thought 155 lbs. was the goal, but the other day I got into a pair of 32" jeans that was part of my costume for The Velocity of Autumn. That is as thin as I need to be.

I was 165 pounds. If I was ever 155 pounds I would be emaciated. No, 165 is the goal. And I am nearly there.

Huh. Everyone talks about losing weight in time for their high school reunion, and look at me.

Planks: yes
Push-ups: yes

Sit-Ups: yes

Life is good, wild and sweet.

Long days, reaching (straining) for the conclusion of rehearsal season. Knees are sore, ankles kinking. 

But we made fifteen runs in September. Well done.

Distance: 3.1 miles

Duration: 27:07
Pace: 8:44

Route: Forest Hill Loop
Temperature: 78°
Climate: dusk, humid
Mood: stressed

Fall 1983 Mixtape

Mama (166 BPM) - Genesis

True - Spandau Ballet

All Night Long (All Night) - Lionel Richie

Ain't Nobody - Rufus ft. Chaka Khan

Heat and Soul - Huey Lewis and the News

What can we say about fall 1983. Sophomore year of high school begins, and so does my association with cannabis. And alcohol. So many opportunities to look like a jackass in public. Speaking of which, it's the weekend of my 40 year high school reunion. Ope.

Stretches: yes
Water: yes
Weight: 168.8 lbs. (+1.8)

Planks: TBA
Push-ups: TBA

Sit-Ups: TBA