Stone cold munching

Yes, I signed up for the Cleveland (Half) Marathon. Not heard good things about "The Cleveland" ... this past year they famously tacked on a few extra miles to the 10K when the lead car took a wrong turn, and folks in Akron were telling me finish line refreshments are limited to potato chips and apple juice. ("Cleveland+" indeed.)

But hey, if I can't schedule training for a 26.2 every year, I can at least fit in a Halfer every year, maybe even twice a year. And as long as it is in town, why not? What is disappointing is that my favorite part of the route is the second half, which follows a route I am all-too-familiar with, down MLK and the Shoreway.

Meanwhile, if you didn't check this one out last month, here's a piece that might piss off a good number of you. I know it did me:

How Oprah Ruined the Marathon - Salon.com 11/3/2007
America's competitive spirit has been wrecked by feel-good amateurs like Oprah whose only goal is to stagger across the finish line.

So blame race organizers for making such events open to anyone. Then go f*ck yourself, you fascist.

Stats:
Distance: 3.25 miles
Weight: 174.5 lbs.
Stretches: yes
Sit-Ups: 40
Snack: Zone Perfect Bar
Drink: Gatorade
Start Time: 2.40 pm
Temperature: 32º
Weather: cold
Gear: Long-sleeve, thermal jacket - but with shorts and no gloves. Got away with it because there was no wind, otherwise that may have been painful.

I took care of the children. I made lunch. I washed dishes. I earned this.

Playlist: (In alphabetical order!)
The Boy in the Bubble - Paul SImon
The Boys - Dragonette
Brand New Colony - The Postal Service
Burn - Nine Inch Nails
Bust a Move - Young MC
Busy Child - The Crystal Method
Cooldown: Call On Me (Radio Edit) - Eric Prydz

Day 3: This body is my ticket out

Taking the bike path by South Green brings forth a barrage of memories every times I take it. Maybe this path was the first place I had ever run using headphones - a brick-heavy Walkman in my hand, wearing a cotton shirt, cotton shorts, and cotton underpants (I'm 18! Who needs support?!) and whatever shoes I had in those days. Can't even guess.

I'd provide the playlist, God, I believe I may even know exactly where that cassette is up in my attic ... but it wouldn't be pretty. Sunday Papers, I believe and Hounds of Love, I don't mind admitting those.

But Twist and Shout? What wretched BPM. And who can forget the George Michael, Aretha Franklin duet, I Knew You Were Waiting (For Me)? That really says "pour it on."

Yesterday, holiday cheer included Bailey's in my coffee virtually all day, a beer, an Old Fashioned and two glasses of wine. How I woke with a clear head, I do not know. Lucky me.

Calvin G.'s Old Fashioned
Muddle a spoon of sugar with a dash of bitters and two drops of water
Stir in 3 oz. bourbon and ice
Twist of lemon; drop peel in glass
Garnish with a slice of orange and a cherry. Spill a little syrup in, too.

Stats:
Distance: roughly 4 miles
Stretches: yes
Sit-Ups: 40
Snack: Zone Perfect Bar (Cinammon Bun - man, the flavor selection is better here.)
Drink: Gatorade
Start Time: 1.45 pm
Temperature: 47º
Weather: Amazing. Bright, sunny & Warm. Wish I hadn't been wearing the jacket.

Playlist:
I'm Afraid of Americans * - David Bowie
Other People * - Prick
Tracking Treasure Down (Dave Seaman's Group Therapy Mix) - Gabriel & Dresden
All Good Things (Come to an End) - Nelly Furtado
Can You Feel It - The Jacksons
Sister Rosetta (Capture the Spirit) - Noisettes
Starting Over (Elite Force Mix) - The Crystal Method
Cooldown: Tribal Dance - 2 Unlimited

"The blood inside of me is inside of you." Happy Boxing Day.

Day 2: Come run, run, run, run, everybody move, run ...

It does not take much for my belly to go slack. And then none of my pants fit. It's a little depressing, but seriously, what does it take for me to remember, and then execute, some simple 20 or so sit-ups a day? It doesn't take much, not really.

Oh, hey - for the Secret Santa thing in my office this year, H. got me a $25 gift card from Dick's! Is that cool or what?

I love the campus during the holidays. There's no one in it.

Stats:
Distance: roughly 4 miles
Stretches: yes
Sit-Ups: 40
Snack (like I needed a snack): Zone Perfect Bar; Chocolate Almond Biscotti - Merry Xmas, yo.
Drink: Gatorade
Start Time: 1.30 pm
Temperature: 43º
Weather: bright and sunny, wore a hat with a visor, shorts and a jacket. Midwinter bliss!

WARNING: Old Man Toilet Talk

Some kind of constipation action going on here, can't figure that out. Oh sure, maybe it's all the cookies, stuffing, meat and Bailey's in my system, but I have been force-feeding myself fruit and water, too. I had this righteous dump after prezzies but I still felt like sitting on the john for another hour.

Until I took that run. The natural laxative!

Playlist:
Warmup: Road to Recovery - Midnight Juggernaut
Pon de Relay- Rihanna
Body Language - Queen
Clubbed to Death (Kurayamino Mix) - Rob D
Five Fathoms - Everything But the Girl
Collision and Improvisation- Pizzicato Five
I Wanna Be a Flintstone - Screaming Blue Messiahs
Get Down (Calvin Harris Remix) - Groove Armada
Cooldown: Doctor Who Theme - Murray Gold & the BBC National Orchestra of Wales

Day 1: Where have all the flowers gone?

Most overdo it with eat, drink and cheer for the holidays, it is my intention to overdo it with running these five days of Christmas.

Since my last outing, everyone has been ill, again. That, coupled with our kitchen being remodeled (at long effing last) has made for a stressful and busy December. Also, it's been hellishly cold.

We are spending the holidays with the out-laws, which means there are others to look after the weeuns. And the wife.

Stats:
Distance: roughly 4 miles
Stretches: Yes!
Sit-Ups: 20!
Lunch: ham & cheese sandwich w/mustard & mayo, chips, quahog chowder
Drink: Gatorade
Start Time: 1.30 pm
Temperature: 38º
Weather: bright, sunny & beautiful, with the wind at my back ... on the way out ...

Playlist:
Lake Shore Driving - Duran Duran
We Prick You * - David Bowie
Voulez Vous - ABBA
Not Sleeping Around - Ned's Atomic Dustbin
Freedome (Back to Reality Mix) - George Michael
Shake It - Metro Station
Black Horse & The Cherry Tree - KT Tunstall
Don't Box Me In * - Stan Ridgeway
You're So Damn Hot - OK Go
Def. Con. One. - Pop Will Eat Itself
Cooldown: The Sweet Escape - Gwen Stefani

He's making violent love to me, mother.

Jingle Bell Run Playlist
About You Now - Sugababes
Jesus Is Pissed - Hostile Omish
Snowman - XTC
It's A Wonderful Life (Gonna Have a Good Time) - Fishbone
Merry Christmas (I Don't Want to Fight) - The Ramones
Black Christmas - Hot Tin Roof
Father Christas - The Kinks
Merry Christmas - Wesley Willis
Little Drummer Boy [demo] - Sister Soleil

Fishbone
"It's A Wonderful Life (Gonna Have A Good Time)"


It was not my intention to take two and a half weeks off. Maybe it was a run in 19 degree weather, maybe it was the kids terrible illnesses prior to Thanksgiving which put me flat on my back for a week. Then the demo guys came in to demolish or kitchen. Suddenly, a squad of Nazi frogmen burst through the front door ... in any case, I'm back.

Did not gain any (more) weight, and yet, it feels like everything which had moved up has slid back down. I mean that phsycially, as well as metaphorically. Chug, chug, chug. Enjoy the holiday tunes.

Stats:
Distance: 3.25 miles
Weight: 170.5 lbs.
Stretches: in a minute ... in a minute ...
Lunch: egg salad sandwich, green salad w/Caesar dressing, pear slices
Drink: water
Start Time: 1.30 pm
Temperature: 39º
Weather: wet

Calvin G.'s Manhattan
5 Tbsp. Old Overholt
3 Tbsp. sweet vermouth
1 dash bitters
build over ice into rock glass
add two maraschino cherries, spill in a little of the syrup
Cheers!

Funkytown!

- or - There's No Stoppin' the Cretin Avenue Hoppin'

Macalester to Mississippi Run

Yes, that was stupid cold. Visiting my brother in St. Paul, felt an extreme need to take off some of yesterday's turkey. Thought I managed myself pretty well during dinner (well, except for that unfortunate business about Juan Williams) not eating everyting I saw but only what I was hungry for ... but I didn't need to have a second dinner before going to bed.

God. That was stupid cold. Cold but fun.

Stats:
Distance: 4.1 miles
Stretches: no
Snack: PowerBar Gel
Drink: coffee
Start Time: 8.00 am
Temperature: 19º
Weather: bright and cold

Playlist:
Lo Bueno Siempre Tiene un Final - Nelly Furtado
Funkytown - Lipps Inc.
Thnks Fr Th Mmrs - Fall Out Boy
Decent Days and Nights * - The Futureheads
Low Rider - War
Gary In The Tardis - The Timelords (The KLF)
I Don't Want to Fall in Love * - She Wants Revenge
Cretin Hop - The Ramones
Burning Down the House - Tom Jones & The Cardigans
Radio Free Europe - R.E.M.

I'm shaking like milk

Time and temper. Those are the elements I have been lacking. Tonight the wife and kids are off at a friend's for a play date. They won't be back until bedtime. I was under orders from the wife to take a run. So run I must.

And glory-be was that satisfying. I was so sleepy driving home from work today. I am sick of waking up every day, maybe every other day, with a sinus headache. Allergies, seasonal change, late nights, children nudging me in the middle of the night keeping me awake, it all adds up to bad rest and a terrible headache.

I have been taking over-the-counter sinus meds instead of my migraine prescription and usually it works. Cheaper than the Imitrex, too.

But wow, that felt good. Perfect running weather, after dark, great tunes - and for the first time in a while my mind wandered where I wantd to go, to my writing. Time and temper, they keep me from that, too.

Excuse me, I have to cut my hair and take a luxurious, uninterrupted shower.

Stats:
Distance: 5.15 miles
Weight: 170 lbs.
Stretches: yes
Snack: PowerBar Triple Threat
Drink: Accelerade
Start Time: 6.00 pm
Temperature: 55º
Weather: damp and cool - excellent

Playlist:
Let's Go to Bed (Milk Mix) - The Cure
Kalifornia - Fatboy Slim
Ooh La La - Goldfrapp
Mea Culpa - Enigma
Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps) - David Bowie
Pump Up the Jam - Technotronic
World In My Eyes - Depeche Mode
Got the Time - Joe Jackson
Master and Servant (Slavery Whip Mix) - Depeche Mode