Saturday, March 21, 2015

Wide, wide open spaces.

Beautiful morning run, overcast and cool.

Yesterday was also very beautiful. Fourteen years we have told the world to go away and taken this day for ourselves to be together, and to remember.

The day began with a lie-in, all four of us in one big bed, telling stories about the birth of all three children. Then an awesome frittata for breakfast before heading to the "rainforest" at the zoo. The otters were not playful today, but they were visible, at least three of them, asleep, curled up inside a burlap sack.

We visited the boy's grave at Riverside Cemetery. His ashes remain in a communal grave sponsored by UH and Great Lakes Crematory. As we understood it, they would unearth the plot once a year to add more remains from the neonatal deaths for the parents who requested they do so. Ours must have been one of the last years before they moved to an adjacent plot on the other side of the large oak tree by the road.

I know this because there are two identical stones, one from the nurses, one from the crematory, taking up two plots, only this one is marked 2003. Ours is not marked with a date. And now, up the road in the other direction, are another two identical stones, one marked 2013.

The one of the two stones we choose to decorate shows its age. Several years ago a backhoe pressed it into the earth so that it sits in an indentation, which collects mud and leaves. This year in particular it was clogged with earth and leaves and broken acorns. There was, however, a winged, purple pony that someone had left. I wonder where all the other parents who used to leave things have gone. One day, a long time from now, we will each stop visiting.

The boy and I used a rake and broom to clear off the stone, and newspaper to wipe off the mud. The girl colored in the bear etching and the wife arranged flowers and acorns. The boy left Nerf bullets.

Fourteen.
Temperature: 45°
Distance: 3.25 miles

Baseline: 178.5 lbs.
Today: 174 lbs. (-1.0)
Goal: 170 lbs.

1994 Playlist
Burn - Nine Inch Nails
I Do Not Want This - Nine Inch Nails
Mr. Self Destruct - Nine Inch Nails
Mystery Train - Michael J. Sheehey
Gel - Collective Soul
Strangers (168 bpm) - Portishead
The Dresses Song - Lisa Germano
She (183 bpm) - Green Day

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